"MELDRUM, the modish _medico_, laughs low At ruddy RASPER'S keenly-whispered _mot_-- RASPER, a soul all strictures, Holds the great world a field for sketchy chaff. Many love not the man, but how they laugh At his swift, scathing pictures! "Wits of all grades, and Talents of all sorts, With rival beauties holding separate courts, Find here parade, employment. And yet, and yet, they all look cross, or tired; Your cultured city has not yet acquired The art of true enjoyment. "Strange! London's poor find pleasure far too dear, But here, with wealth, and wit, and charm, and cheer, All should go _so_ delightfully. Time gay as in the Golden Age should fleet, But the most brilliant stars in Babylon meet, And--bore each other frightfully." (_To be continued._) * * * * * IN THE NAME OF CHARITY--GO TO PRISON! LAST week _Mr. Punch_ asked, "Oh, where, and oh where, is The Public Prosecutor?" and he has received an answer. It appears that the official has been recently engaged (his letter is dated the 30th of November) in suppressing an "illegal scheme" to aid the funds of the North-West London Hospital. It appears that, with a view to increasing the revenue of that most deserving charity, it was arranged to treat some presents that had been made to the Institution as "prizes," to be given to those who sent donations to the hospital. There was to be a "drawing," which was to be duly advertised in the daily papers. But this could not be tolerated. Sir A. K. STEPHENSON, Solicitor to Her Majesty's Treasury, after denouncing the scheme in the terms above set forth, informed the Secretary of the Hospital, "that all persons concerned therein subjected themselves to the penalties imposed by the Acts passed for the suppression of illegal lotteries." Well, the law is the law, and it would never do for _Mr. Punch_ to dispute the point with so learned a gentleman as Sir A. K. STEPHENSON--the more especially as Sir A. K. S. has just been patented a Q.C.--but if the Public Prosecutor can stop "illegal schemes" for benefiting the sick, why can he not also deal with the professional perjurers, suborners of witnesses, and fabricators of false evidence? _Mr. Punch_ pauses for a reply, but is disinclined to pause much longer! * * * * * OUR TURN NOW.--An excited paragraph in the morning papers announces that "two Doctors of Vienna have succeeded in discovering the Influenza _bacillus_ after a series of experiments in the Chemical and Physiological Laboratory of the University." This is capital. Hitherto the Influenza _bacillus_ has discovered _us_. Now the tables are turned, and the question is, What shall we do with our prize? A little transaction in boiling lead might not be bad to begin with. * * * * * [Illustration: AN OLD FABLE.