Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98 January 11, 1890Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98 January 11, 1890
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
"Done?" said J. CAESAR in the colloquial Latin of the day. "Why, haul the
fleet up on to the beach."
So they brought the ships ashore; CAESAR intrenched them within a camp,
and remained there till the weather improved. Your host presses upon
your acceptance a handful of soil from the _tumuli_.
"CAESAR'S foot may have pressed it," he says, as you, with a perhaps
exaggerated appearance of pleasurable interest, pocket the dust, being
careful to turn your pocket inside out as soon as you are beyond sight
of the castle on your homeward way.
As your hansom pulls up abruptly under the shadow of the ancient castle,
you find your further progress stopped by a _fosse_, across which is
haughtily flung a sixteenth-century drawbridge. HENRY THE EIGHTH, in a
rare moment of leisure from domestic affairs, built Walmer Castle for
the defence of the coast. You are much struck with the architectural
design, which resembles in some degree a mass of _blancmange_ turned out
of a mould. Four round lunettes of stone, wearily worked by hands now
cold, stand four-square to all the winds that blow. In the middle is a
great round tower, with a cistern on the top, and underneath an arched
cavern which you are pleased to learn is bomb-proof. As you cross the
drawbridge, you feel bound to admit that the prospect is not inviting.
It seems as if you were going to prison instead of to visit, at his
marine residence, one of the most courtly and (peradventure) the most
hospitable noblemen of his age. The severe stonework frowns upon you;
the portholes stare, and you almost wish that, regardless of expense,
you had kept your hansom waiting.
But all uneasiness vanishes as you cross the reverberating stone floor,
and pass into the apartments fronting the sea. You feel as if you had
journeyed into a new world, a sunnier clime. Your host, with
outstretched hand, welcomes you to Walmer, and makes kindly inquiries as
to the incidents of your journey.
"It is, I expect, very cold in London," he says, with his genial smile;
"you will find it Walmer here."
You protest that varieties of temperature are of very inconsiderable
concern to you, and, throwing yourself on the walnut couch by the recess
window, daintily draped with orange-and-blue chintz, you gaze forth on
the varied scene without. The stately ships go on to their haven under
the hill; the ever-changing procession presses on, homeward or outward
bound; and, beyond, the unbroken, treacherous barrier of the Goodwin
Sands.
"It's strange you should choose that place," your host says, in his
soft, liquid tones; "that was the favourite corner of a former
predecessor in the honourable office I now hold. In the first year of
this century, as you know, WILLIAM PITT was Lord Warden of the Cinque
Ports, and, tradition says, used, when he came down here, to sit at that
very window by the hour, gazing across the Downs towards the coast of
France, where his great enemy was preparing for a descent on the British
coast."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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