Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98, June 14 1890Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98, June 14 1890
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Talk about Police Regulation for Procession on Saturday to demonstrate
against Compensation Bill. Citizen PICKERSGILL moved adjournment
of House in order to discuss matter. CUNNINGHAME-GRAHAM seized
opportunity to run amuck at his revered Leaders on Front Opposition
Bench. Accused them of sitting there like stuffed figures at Madame
Tussaud's. "Why stuffed?" JOHN MOBLEY asked, but CUNNINGHAME-GRAHAM
not to be interrupted in flush of eloquence. When once started went
at them hammer and tongs; only a few battered figures recognisable on
Front Bench when he had finished.
"Fact is, TOBY," he said, "BRADLAUGH'S got his eye on that Bench.
Means to sit there some day. Want him to know that even that sanctuary
shall not preserve him from my wrath. Just getting my hand in.
He'll be sorry he ever ventured to bite his thumb at me." _Business
done._--Education Vote in Committee.
_Thursday._--Lord CHUNNEL-TANNEL moves Second Reading of his Bill. A
very inoffensive measure, he says; not proposed to sanction creation
of Tunnel under the sea. Oh, dear no! Nothing of that kind. All
that is wanted is that the Company shall be permitted to keep their
machinery oiled, bore for coal, and fill up spare time by fishing for
whitebait with line. Could there be any harm in that? CHUNNEL-TANNEL
asked, with hand outstretched with deprecating gesture towards
Treasury Bench, on which the long length of HICKS BEACH was coiled.
[Illustration: Citizen Pickersgill.]
Mr. G. backed up his noble friend; ridiculed idea of danger to England
from creation of Tunnel. If anybody had need for apprehension, it was
France--a fine, subtly patriotic idea, which did not meet with that
measure of applause on Conservative Benches that might have been
expected. Fact is, Conservatives don't like this newly established
friendliness between Mr. G. and CHUNNEL-TANNEL. Noble Lord not so
certain to respond to crack of Ministerial Whip as was his wont
before he yielded to the spell. Stout Ministerialists thinking more
of CHUNNEL-TANNEL'S attitude on Irish Question than of probability of
French invasion by proposed Tunnel; so they lustily cheer HICKS-BEACH
when he denounces scheme. Cry, "Oh! oh!" when CHUNNEL-TANNEL makes
crafty appeal for support of Irish Members, and go out in body to stop
up the Tunnel.
J. S. FORBES watches scene from Strangers' Gallery. Lost in admiration
of CHUNNEL-TANNEL'S meek mood.
"Why, TOBY," he said, in his perturbation brushing his new
curly-brimmed hat the wrong way, "he looks as if butter wouldn't
melt in his mouth. His low voice, his deferential manner, his pained
surprise at suggestion of wanting to do anything else but catch
those whitebait with a line, take one's breath away. A wonderful man
CHUNNEL-TANNEL, but dangerous on this tack. Known him and fought him
man and boy for twenty years; fear him most when in melting mood."
_Business done._--Discussing Tithes Bill.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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