_The Sardonic L._ 'Ere 's a swell turn-out and no mistake--with a couple o' bloomin' beadles standin' be'ind! There's a full-fed 'un inside of it too,--look at the dimonds all over 'er bloomin' old nut. _My_ eye! (_The elderly dowager inside produces a cut-glass scent-bottle of goodly size._) Ah, she's got a drop o' the right sort in there--see her sniffin at it--it won't take 'er long to mop up that little lot! _Jeames (behind the carriage, to_ CHAWLES). Our old geeser's perdoocin' the custimary amount o' sensation, eh, CHAWLEY? _Chawles (under notice)._ Well, thank 'Eving, I shan't have to share the responsibility of her _much_ longer! _'Arriet (to_ ARRY). I wonder they don't get tired o' being stared at like they are. _'Arry._ Bless your 'art--_they_ don't mind--they _like_ it. They'll go 'ome and s'y (_in falsetto_) "Ow, Pa, all the bloomin' crowd kep' on a lookin' at us through the winder--it _was_ proime!" _'Arriet (giggling admiringly)._ 'Ow do _you_ know the w'y they tork? _'Arry (superior)._ Why, they don't tork partickler different from what you and me tork--do they? _First Mechanic._ See all them old blokes in red with the rum 'ats, BILL? They're Beefeaters goin' to the Pallis, they are. _Second M._ What do they do when they git there? _First M._ Do? oh, mind the bloomin' stair-case, and chuck out them as don't beyave themselves. _A Restless Lady (to her husband)._ HARRY, I don't like this place at all. I'm sure we could see better somewhere else. Do let's try and squeeze in somewhere lower down ... No, this is worse--that _horrid_ tobacco! Suppose we cross over to the Palace? [_They do so._ _A Policeman._ Too late to cross now, Sir--go back please. [_They go back and take up a position in front of the crowd on the curbstone._ _The R. L._ There, we shall see beautifully here, HARRY. _A Crusty Matron (talking at the R. L. and her husband.)_ Well, I'm sure, some persons have got a cheek, coming in at the last minnit and standing in front of those that have stood here hours--that's ladylike, I _don't_ think! Nor yet, I didn't come here to have my eye poked out by other parties' pairosols. [_Continues in this strain until the R. L. can stand it no longer, and urges her husband to depart._ _Chorus of Policemen._ Pass along there, please, one way _or_ the other--keep moving there, Sir. _The R. L._ But where are we to _go_--we must stand _somewhere_? _A Policeman._ Can't stand anywhere 'ere, Mum. [_The unhappy couple are passed on from point to point, until they are finally hemmed in at a spot from which it is impossible to see anything whatever._ _Harry._ If you had only been content to stay where you were at first, we should have been all right! _The R. L._ Nonsense, it is all your fault, you _are_ the most hopeless person to go anywhere with. Why didn't you tell one of those policemen _who we were_? _Harry._ Why? Well, because I didn't see one who looked as if it would interest him, if you want to know.