_September_.--The last 101-ton gun having been melted down for the forging of the metal piles for one of the four newly-projected Channel bridges, a nasty international feeling, fermented by General Officers who are obliged to sweep crossings and drive four-wheeled cabs for a livelihood,--and who do not like it,--begins to manifest itself, and diplomacy intervening irritably only to make matters worse, several ultimatums are dispatched from some of the Great Powers to others, but owing to the want of soldiers, the matter is put into the hands of International Solicitors, who, arranging a stand-up fight for the President of the French Republic and the CZAR against the Emperors of GERMANY and AUSTRIA, and the KING of ITALY, the matter somehow falls through for the moment, and the public excitement subsides. _October_.--General note from all the Great Powers to each other announcing their secession from the "League of Peace," and declaring their intention of resorting again to "_Protective Armament_" as soon as possible. War declared all round before the end of the month. * * * * * VOCES POPULI. AT THE GUELPH EXHIBITION. IN THE CENTRAL HALL. _A Thrifty Visitor_ (_on entering_). Catalogue? No. What's the use of a Catalogue? Miserable thing, the size of a tract, that tells you nothing you don't know! _His Wife_ (_indicating a pile of Catalogues on table_). Aren't _these_ big enough for you? _The Thr. V._ Those? Why, they're big enough for the _London Directory_! Think I'm going to drag a thing like that about the place? You don't really want a Catalogue--it's all your fancy! _Mr. Prattler_ (_to Miss AMMERSON_). Oh, _do_ stop and look at these _sweet_ goldfish! Pets! Don't you _love_ them? _Aren't_ they tame? _Miss Ammerson_. Wouldn't do to have them _wild_--might jump out and _bite_ people, you know! _Mr. P._ It's _too_ horrid of you to make fun of my poor little enthusiasms! But really,--couldn't we get something and feed them?--_Do_ let's! _Miss A._ I daresay you could get ham-sandwiches in the Restaurant--or chocolates. _Mr. P._ How unkind you are to me! But I don't care. (_Wilfully._) I shall come here all by myself, and bring biscuits. Great big ones! Are you determined to take me into that big room with all the Portraits? Well, you must tell me who they all are then, and which are the Guelphiest ones. IN THE ROYAL ROOM. _Considerate Niece_ (_to Uncle_). They seem mostly Portraits here. You're sure you don't _mind_ looking at them, Uncle? I know so many people _do_ object to Portraits. _Uncle_ (_with the air of a Christian Martyr_). No, my dear, no: _I_ don't mind 'em. Stay here as long as you like, I'll sit down and look at the people, till you've done. _First Critical Visitor_ (_examining a View of St. James's Park_). I wonder where that was taken. In Scotland, I expect--there's two Highlanders there, you see.