BROWN wound up the armony of our truly appy heavening by singing his new song of, "The LORD MARE leads a nappy life," and we sort our seweral nupshal couches as happy and contented a lot as his Lordship hisself, our werry larst drink all round being to the follering sentiment given out by me as the prowd Chairman: "May all the well to do in this grand old London of ours enjoy as merry a Crismus as we have enjoyed to-night, and may they all give a kind thort, and a liberal stump-up, to all the poor and needy who so badly wants it this bitter weather." ROBERT. * * * * * OUR BOOKING-OFFICE. [Illustration: Toll'd after Supper. Subject for a Knellegy.] MR. JEROME K. JEROME, or, more easily pronounced, "Mr. JERUMKY JERUM," is occasionally very amusing in his book for Christmastide, entitled _Told After Supper_. What he wants, that is, what he ought to have whether he wants it or not, is judicious editing. Had this process been applied to this eccentric haphazardy book, scarcely more than a third of it would have been published. "His style, in this book at least, and, for my part," says the Baron, "I say the same of his _Three Men in a Tub_, suggests the idea of his writing being the work of a young man who, among his companions and admirers, has earned the reputation of being a 'deuced funny chap,' and so has to struggle to live up to this reputation, or to live it down." JERUMKY JERUM still somewhat affects Yankee humour, not, however, in so forced and vulgar a manner as in his overpraised _Three Men in a Boat_. Two of the Ghost Stories are humorous, but their setting is unworthy of them. Had they been introduced into a tale as DICKENS (of whose style there is a very palpable attempt at imitation in the description of a stormy winter's night) brought in his story of _Tom Smart_, and of the inimitable _Gabriel Grub_, their mirth-raising value would have been considerably enhanced. As it is, these choice morsels--sandwich'd in between heavy slabs of doughy material--stand a chance of not being tasted. To anyone who comes across the book the Baron says, "read about the Curate and the Card-trick, and JOHNSON and EMILY. The tinted paper on which it is printed is a mistake, as are also most of the amateurish illustrations." [Illustration: Goblins.] _WOMAN_--not "lovely woman" who "stoops to folly"--nor woman who in our hour of ease is uncertain, coy, and hard to please. But Woman, the weekly _Woman_ who is doing uncommonly well and in her fifty-third number, gave the week before Christmas, her idea of a Christmas dinner, and, but for "sweetbread cutlets," a very good and simple dinner it was. The same _Woman_ gave also, among a variety of next-day's treatments of Turkey, _Turkey in Aspic_, Turkey in Europe, and Turkey in Asia--yes--but what about "Turkey in Aspic"? It doesn't look well; much better in French. But we dare say it's very good, though, for breakfast or supper, "devilled Turkey" is "hard to beat."