Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 100, March 21, 1891Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 100, March 21, 1891
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
HERBERT MAXWELL, put up from Treasury Bench to reply for Government,
did his work admirably. After fearful _fiasco_ with CHAPLIN last
Friday, OLD MORALITY checked disposition to give young Ministers
opportunity of distinguishing themselves. If MAXWELL made a mull of
this, following on Friday week's catastrophe with CHAPLIN, it would be
serious. MAXWELL won more than negative credit of not making mistake.
He delivered excellent speech, showing complete mastery of subject.
_Business done_.--House Counted Out again.
_Thursday_.--An Irish night at last, Quite a long time since we talked
of the distressful country. Wouldn't guess that Ireland was to the
fore by looking at the Irish quarter. Usual when Prince ARTHUR is
on his feet expounding and defending his policy for Irish camp to be
bristling with contradiction and contumely. To-night only five there,
including BRER RABBIT. BRER FOX promised to come, but hasn't turned
up. Understood to be engaged in composition of new Manifesto. Towards
midnight Prince ARTHUR, wearied of the quietude, observed that he
didn't believe there was a single Irish Member present. Whereupon
NOLAN, waking from sleep, under shadow of Gallery, indignantly shouted
out, "What?" TANNER, just come in, roared, "Oh!" "Ah!" said Prince
ARTHUR, and the conversation terminated.
[Illustration: Mr. Swift McNeill "prating."]
Explanation of singular abstention is, that business under discussion
is Vote on account of Relief of Distress in Ireland. Prince ARTHUR
asks for £55,000 for that purpose; wouldn't do for Irish Members to
obey their first instinct, and oppose Vote moved by Chief Secretary.
If they were there, they might be expected to say, "Thank you;"
so they stay away, one or two just looking in to contradict T.W.
RUSSELL--"Roaring" RUSSELL, SARK calls him--when he gave an account
of what he saw during a recent visit to Ireland.
_Business done_.--Relief voted for Irish Distress.
_Friday Night_.--Lo! a strange thing happened. Fell asleep just
now, amid deadly dulness, depth of which no one outside House can
comprehend. Woke up, hearing familiar voice. 'Twas the voice of Prince
ARTHUR, I heard him complain; something about Ground-rents in London.
Not, quite his subject; voice, too, didn't seem to come from Treasury
Bench. But no mistaking it; same tone; same inflection. Now I come to
think of it, more like way he used to talk before he came to govern
Ireland. Opened eyes; looked down; behold! it was brother GERALD,
opposing STUART's Motion on Land Tax. Very odd; think I'll go to sleep
again.
_Business done_.--Slept.
* * * * *
THE SONG OF THE BACILLUS.
[Not a week passes without our hearing of a fresh agent to
destroy the Bacillus.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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