Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, August 22, 1891Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, August 22, 1891
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Being already carried away in imagination to Reims, and returning by
Paris, I am at once inclined to reply,
"_Enchanté!_ with the greatest pleasure."
"_Hoch! Hoch! Hurrá!_" he cries, by way of response, waving his hat.
Then he sings loudly, "And--bless the Prince of WALES!" After which,
being rather proud of his mastery of Cockneyisms, he changes the
accent, still singing, "Blaass the Prince of WAILES!" which he
considers his _chef d'oeuvre_ as an imitation of a genuine Cockney
tone, to which it bears exactly such resemblance as does a scene
of ordinary London life drawn by a French artist. Then he says,
seriously--"_Eh bien! allons! C'est fixé_--it is fixed. We meet
Victoria, _et alors, par_ London, Chatham & Dover, from Reims _viâ_
Calais, _très bien,--train d'onze heures précises,--bien entendu. J'y
suis. Ihr Diener! Adios! A reverderla! Addio, amico caro!_" Then he
utters something which is between a sneeze and a growl, supposed to
be a term of endearment in the Russian tongue. Finally he says in
English, "Good-bye!"
His hat is on in a jiffy (which I take to be the hundredth part of a
second) and he is down the stairs into the hall, and out at the door
"like a flying light comedian" with an airy "go" about him, which
recalls to my mind the running exits of CHARLES WYNDHAM in one of
his lightest comedy-parts. "_Au revoir! Pour Jeudi alors!_" I hear
him call this out in the hall; the door bangs as if a firework had
exploded and blown my vivacious friend up into the air, and he has
gone.
"_Jeudi alors_" arrives, and I am at Victoria for the eleven o'clock
Express to the minute, having decided that this is the best, shortest,
and cheapest holiday I can take. I've never yet travelled with
my excellent French friend DAUBINET. I am to be his guest; all
responsibility is taken off my shoulders except that of my ticket and
luggage, and to travel without responsibility is in itself a novelty.
To have to think of nothing and nobody, not even of oneself! Away!
away!
* * * * *
[Illustration]
POLITESSE.--The following version of our great popular Naval Anthem
will be issued, it is hoped, from Whitehall (the French being supplied
by the Lords of the Admiralty in conjunction) to all the musical Naval
Captains in command at Portsmouth. The graceful nature of the intended
compliment cannot escape the thickest-headed land-lubber:--
Dirige, Madame la France,
Madame la France dirigera les vagues!
Messieurs les Français ne seront jamais, jamais, jamais,
Esclaves!
The effect of the above, when the metre is carefully fitted to the
tune (which is a work of time), and sung by a choir (with accent) of a
thousand British Blue-jackets, will doubtless be quite electrical.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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