Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, April 2, 1892 — John Shaqi
Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, April 2, 1892Various
General
Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, April 2, 1892
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Real difficulties and sufferings begin when you reach the
Cruach-na-spiel-bo, which sounds like Gaelic, and will serve us as
a name for the river. It is, of course, extremely probable that you
pay a large rent for the right to gaze at a series of red and raging
floods, or at a pale and attenuated trickle of water, murmuring
peevishly through a drought. But suppose, for the sake of argument,
that the water is "in order," and only running with deep brown swirls
at some thirty miles an hour. Suppose also, a large presumption, that
the Duffer does not leave any indispensable part of his equipment
at home. He arrives at the stream, and as he detests a gillie, whose
contempt for the Duffer breeds familiarity, he puts up his rod,
selects a casting line, knots on the kind of fly which is locally
recommended, and steps into the water. Oh, how cold it is! I begin
casting at the top of the stream, and step from a big boulder into a
hole. Stagger, stumble, violent bob forwards, recovery, trip up, and
here one is in a sitting position in the bed of the stream. However,
the high india-rubber breeks have kept the water out, except about a
pailful, which gradually illustrates the equilibrium of fluids in the
soles of one's stockings. However, I am on my feet again, and walking
more gingerly, though to the spectator, my movements suggest partial
intoxication. That is because the bed of the stream is full of
boulders, which one cannot see, owing to the darkness of the water.
There was a fish rose near the opposite side. My heart is in my mouth.
I wade in as far as I can, and make a tremendous swipe with the rod. A
frantic tug behind, crash, there goes the top of the rod! I am caught
up in the root of a pine-tree, high up on the bank at my back. No
use in the language of imprecation. I waddle out, climb the bank,
extricate the fly, get out a spare top, and to work again, more
cautiously. Something wrong, the hook has caught in my coat, between
my shoulders. I must get the coat off somehow, not an easy thing to
do, on account of my india-rubber armour. It is off at last. I cut
the hook out with a knife making a big hole in the coat, and cast
again. That was over him! I let the fly float down, working it
scientifically. No response. Perhaps better look at the fly. Just my
luck, I have cracked it off!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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