CECIL RAMSEY, as "W.G.," a youthful athlete, was admirable. They were all in _Walker, London_. In reply to Mr. T.H. BOLTON, who wished to know _if the Witness considered his Theatre a substantial edifice_, Mr. TOOLE said that he certainly did, because, you see, the Theatre would never go to pieces as long as the pieces went to the Theatre, and as long as it was supported by the public. _Have I any complaint_? Nothing to speak of, except a touch of gout. Oh, beg pardon, you meant _complaint as to the Theatre_? Oh, no, except it's not large enough to hold the millions who can't be crammed in nightly. Has an excellent Acting Manager in Mr. GEORGE LEE, and as to friend BILLINGTON'S stage-management of the House Boat (the scene, he might say, was painted by Mr. HARKER, a name not unknown at the Mansion House), it is the best thing of the sort ever done. Any evening that Mr. PLUNKET, Mr. WOODALL, or Mr. BOLTON, or any other of the Honourable Gentlemen would like to look in and see _Walker, London_, they have only to send to the Box Office, or any of the Libraries, and book in advance--he couldn't say fairer than that--because it was advice that he always gave to "Friend IRVING," and which he had adopted. No more? Hope he doesn't intrude. Would the Committee excuse his glove? Yes? Then, remember, _Walker, London_. Mr. J.L. TOOLE then hurried out. After his departure it was found that all the spectators had on their backs adhesive labels advertising _Walker, London_. * * * * * [Illustration: A WARNING. _Archie_ (_to his Sister, who has been reading him Fairy Tales_). "WON'T THERE BE A LOT OF _US_, IF NONE OF US GO AND GET MARRIED? WORSE THAN _HOP O'MY THUMB_!" _Sister._ "YES; BUT YOU KNOW _I_ MEAN TO BE MARRIED!" _Archie._ "DO YOU MEAN TO SAY YOU'D GO AND LIVE ALONE WITH A MAN AFTER READING _BLUEBEARD_?"] * * * * * A WAITING GAME. WARY WILLIAM, _loquitur_:-- _Drat that dog_! Dogs are mixed,--like men. Few know how to _jog_; Hasty tongue and pen, Many a bungler bog, Steady! _I_'ll say when! Lots of dogs I've bred. Most want whip, a deal. This one, be it said, Is more hot than leal; Wants to go ahead, Hates to come to heel! Skies are overcast; Slowly comes the spring, Quarry's tracked--at last, Strong, though, on the wing. Steady! Not so fast! Waiting game's the thing. 'Tother WILLIAM'S style Rather spoiled this pup. _Steady_! Wait awhile! H-RC-RT's like a Krupp. I can stroll, and smile-- Till the birds get up. Half-bred dogs--well, well, Mustn't talk like that! Else they'll call _me_ "swell." _Down! What are you at_? Scurry and pell-mell Do not 'bell the cat.' Sport is not a mere Game of "Spill and pelt" Patience! End is near. _Down_! Brute wants a welt! Modern breed runs queer; That I long have felt.