But now to glance at the Ascot Programme--it is such a lengthy and important one, that a mere glance will be quite sufficient for me, whereas a _man_ would study the thing for a week and then know nothing about it! I will just mention a few horses that my readers will do well to "keep their eye on," that is if they can--for really at Ascot one does not pay much attention to the races--and in conclusion I will give my "one-horse selection" for the _last_ in the Gold Cup. The expression "one-horsed," is, I believe, generally used contemptuously, but it must serve till I find time to think out another, which is impossible at present, as the luncheon-gong has just sounded, and I have visions of a lobster-salad and iced Hock-Cup! And now to prophesy? On the "_Queen's Birthday_" a "_Sprightly_" "_Buccaneer_" gave an "_Order_" to attack "_Harfleur_", captured the town, and at the end of the "_Comedy_" paid the "_Bill_!" Yours devotedly, LADY GAY. GOLD CUP TIP. The bloom on the leaf of a first-rate cigar Is expressed by the trade as "Flor Fina," But the sight, to a racing-man, finer by far Is the bloom of the mare "_Caterina_!" * * * * * GOOD NEWS!!--"Apprehended Great Cyclone!" So ran the heading of a paragraph in the _Daily Telegraph_ last Friday. We trust this turbulent person once apprehended, will be sentenced and imprisoned. * * * * * NOTICE.--Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS., Printed Matter, Drawings, or Pictures of any description, will in no case be returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope, Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule there will be no exception.