"Yes." said BROOKFIELD, looking a little more uneasy than before; "very clear, and to the point; but fancy--er--I've heard it before." "Of course you have," I said. "It's in your book; see page 123. Mind you let me know when your speech in the House is coming off, After reading _The Speaker's A B C_, I wouldn't miss it for anything." _Business done._--Dissolution postponed. * * * * * HORACE IN LONDON. TO A MINERAL WATER. (_AD FONTEM BANDUSIUM._) [Illustration] O well of Malvern, immaculate fountain; Worthy to blend with the Dew of the Mountain, To-morrow, thy rill, gushing brightly, SCHWEPPÉ shall aërate slightly; SCHWEPPÉ (pronounced with an accent as spelt, Sir.) SCHWEPPÉ, purveyor of soda and seltzer, And potass (for gout in one's joint meant.) Unto the QUEEN, "by appointment." Thee not the furnace of Sirius raging Touches; thy natural cool is assuaging, Unmixed, to the temperate classes, Mixed, for the thirst of wild asses. Malvern, with me for thy rhapsodist, what'll Rival the sparkle of bard and of bottle-- The bottle in cups effervescent, In couplets the bard, as at present. * * * * * "LIKE NIOBE" (_suggested advertisement for the Strand Theatre_). Instead of boards up on which is inscribed, "_House Full_," "_No Standing Room_," and so forth, why not simply, "Niobe--all tiers" (full). * * * * * NOTICE--Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS., Printed Matter, Drawings, or Pictures of any description, will in no case be returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope, Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule there will be no exception.