Sir MINTING BLOUNDELL, whose criticism on my contribution to your well-written journal I invited, complimented me on my style, and suggested that when giving my selections it might be as well to refer to the "Home Trials" of the horses mentioned--but I venture to disagree with him! Goodness knows we all have home trials enough! (Lord ARTHUR and I frequently do not speak for a week unless someone is present)--but I do not think these things should be made public, and besides, it is an unwritten law amongst "smart" people to avoid subjects that "chafe"--which sounds like an anachronism--whatever that means! Having an opportunity of a "last word" on the Derby, I should like to say that, although my confidence in my last week's selection, _La Flêche_, is unshaken, I wish to have a second "arrow" to my bow in _Llanthony_--of whom a very keen judge of racing (Lord BOURNEMOUTH to wit) has formed the opinion that--in his own words--"he will be on the premises"! The premises in question being Epsom Downs, there will undoubtedly be room for him without his filling an unnecessarily prominent position, so I will couple _Llanthony_ with _La Flêche_ to supply the probable last in the Derby. Meanwhile, I must say a word or two about the Ladies' Race at Epsom on Friday next. There is absolutely no knowing what will start for the Oaks nowadays until the numbers go up--and no Turf Prophet will venture a selection until the morning of the race--and _this_ is where the perspicuity of an Editor like yourself, _Mr. Punch_, scores a distinct hit--for such a paltry consideration as "knowing nothing about it" is not likely to daunt a woman who takes as her motto the well-known line from SHAKSPEARE: "Thus Angels rush where Cowards fear to tread!"--so herewith I confidently append my verse selection for the last Mare in the Oaks! Yours devotedly, LADY GAY. THE TIP. 'Tis the voice of the Sluggard, I hear him complain, You have waked me too soon--an unpleasant surprise! In an hour or so later pray call me again, When, if feeling refreshed, I will straightway "_Arise!_" * * * * * QUITE IN KEEPING.--The Earl of DYSART has left the ranks of the Liberal Unionists and become a Gladstonian Home-Ruler. "What more natural?" asked one of his former Unionist friends. "Of course he's dysarted us!" * * * * * [Illustration: A MISUNDERSTANDING. _He._ "OH, IF I'D ONLY BEEN A 'BEAR'!" _She._ "IF YOU HAD BEEN, YOU COULDN'T GROWL WORSE THAN YOU DO!"] * * * * * ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT. EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.