Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, March 12, 1892Various
General
Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, March 12, 1892
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
In respect of business, not getting on at all. Things going awry.
Ministerialists won't come up to scratch in Division Lobby; Majority
that used to flash forth a hundred-candlelight strong, now flickered
down to a score. Opposition growing jubilant and aggressive; Irish
Members, long quiescent, waking up as of yore. To-night Prince ARTHUR,
stung to quick by remarks from JOHN DILLON, made rattling speech
defending his Irish policy; poured contumely and scorn on heads of
Irish Members.
"You," he said, with gesture of passionate scorn, "see no source of
regeneration for Ireland but in refusal of tenants to pay their rent."
Lord ELCHO and other young bloods on Ministerial Bench cheered; old
stagers looked grave.
"Ah, ah!" said CAMPBELL-BANNERMAN, looking on from the Front
Opposition Bench, "I spy the beard of the Irish Secretary under the
muffler of the Leader of the House."
"Dear me," said ESSLEMONT, who overheard the remark; "I don't remember
BALFOUR with a beard when he was at the Irish Office. You're not
mixing him up with GRANDOLPH?"
"Get thee to a nunnery, worthy draper," said CAMPBELL-BANNERMAN, "and
in that leisurely retirement read your SHAKSPEARE."
"A nunnery!" cried ESSLEMONT, more than ever bewildered; "why they
wouldn't let me in. I suppose you mean a monastery; but man and boy
for fifty years I've gone to Kirk, and nothing would--" By this time
CAMPBELL-BANNERMAN was out of hearing.
_Business done_.--One Vote in Committee of Supply.
_Tuesday_.--The MARKISS not in his place in Lords to-night. Looked in
at Arlington Street to inquire if absence was due to illness.
"Not at all, TOBY," said the MARKISS who, indeed, looked quite fit.
"There was nothing particular on the paper to-night, so I didn't go
down. It's necessary for Nephew ARTHUR to be regular in his attendance
on the Commons. But in the Lords it's different. A happy fortune
places the Leader there in a position that relieves him from strain
of unbroken attendance. With STRATHEDEN AND CAMPBELL looking after
foreign policy, and DENMAN taking charge of home affairs, my post is
really a sinecure. They talk about ending or mending of the House of
Lords; but as long as we are blessed with this remarkable combination
of legislative and administrative capacity we can laugh at the idle
threats."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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