Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 102, May 14, 1892Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 102, May 14, 1892
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
"Shoot what?" said I, for my head was not yet above the crest of the
hillock. He only made a gesture, and getting my eye-glass above the
level, I saw quite a lot of deer, stags, and hinds, within fifty yards
of us. They were interested, apparently, in a party of shepherds,
walking on a road which crossed the moor at a distance, and had no
thoughts to spare for us. "Which am I to shoot?" I whispered.
"The big one, him between the two hinds to the left." I took deadly
aim, my heart beating audibly, like a rusty pump in a dry season.
My hands were shaking like aspen leaves, but I got the sight on him,
under his shoulder, and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened, I pulled
the trigger of the second barrel. Nothing occurred. "Ye have the
safety-bolts in," whispered HUGH, and he accommodated that portion of
the machinery, which I do not understand. Was all this calculated to
set a man at his ease? I took aim afresh, pulled the trigger again.
Nothing! "Ye're on half-cock," whispered HUGH, adding some remark in
Gaelic, which, of course, I did not understand. Was it my fault? It
was not my own rifle, I repeat, and the hammers, at half-cock, looked
as high as those of my gun, full-cocked.
All this conversation had aroused the attention of the deer. Off they
scuttled at full speed, and I sent a couple of bullets vaguely after
them, in the direction of a small forest of horns which went tossing
down a glade. I don't think I hit anything, and HUGH, without making
any remark, took the rifle and strode off in a new direction. I was
nearly dead with fatigue, I was wishing Mr. BRYCE and the British
Tourist my share of Access to Mountains, when we reached the crown of
a bank above a burn, which commanded a view of an opposite slope. HUGH
wriggled up till his eyes were on a level with the crest, and got his
long glass out. After some interval of time, he wakened me, to say
that if I snored like that, I would not get a shot. Then he showed
me, or tried to show me, through the glass, a stag and three hinds,
far off to our right. I did not see them, I very seldom see anything
that people point out to me, but I thought it wise to humour him, and
professed my satisfaction. Was I to shoot at them? No, they were about
half a mile off, but, if I waited, they would feed up to us, so we
waited, HUGH nudging me at intervals to keep me awake. Meanwhile I was
practising aiming at a distant rock, about the place where I expected
to get my shot, as HUGH instructed me. I thought the wretched
rifle was at half-cock, and I aimed away, very conscientiously, for
practice. Presently the rifle went off with a bang, and I saw the
dust fly on the stone I had been practising at. It had not been
at half-cock, after all; warned by my earlier misfortunes, HUGH
had handed the rifle to me cocked. The stag and the hinds were in
wild retreat at a considerable distance. I had some difficulty in
explaining to HUGH, how this accident had occurred, nor did he seem
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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