Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, October 1, 1892Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, October 1, 1892
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
The _Daily Graphic_ published a specific against cholera, alleged to
have been invented by Doctor PICK, a German. Evidently "Our pick'd
man of countries." As it is something to drink, and not to eat,
the inventor is under no necessity to be known henceforth as Dr.
PICK-AND-CHEWS. His remedy is to treat the _bacilli_ to Rhine
Wine. The result of experiments has been "so much the worse for the
_bacilli_." Substitute for the first vowel in "grapes" the third of
the vowels, and it is of that the poor bacillus suffers, and dies. As
the poet GROSSMITH sings of the German Rhine,--
"_That_ of the Fatherland,
The happy Fatherland,
Gives the greatest pain inside."
However, the Bacillus is an enemy, and if he can be got rid of by
_grape-shot_, pour it in and spare not.
* * * * *
NEW PUBLICATION.--"_The Dumb D._" Musical Novel. Companion to _The
Silent Sea_, by Mrs. MACLEOD.
* * * * *
INNS AND OUTS.
NO. IV.--THE WINDOW-SHUTTERS.
"And efery time _he_ gif a shoomp, _he_ make de winders sound."
I do not allude to the white wooden Venetian work that shades the
Grand Hotel windows. It is of the clique who insist on shutting the
windows that I write. Briefly speaking, the inmates of the Grand
Hotel may be divided into two classes--the window-openers and the
window-shutters. The former are all British. The same Britons who
at the Club scowl at a suspicion of draught, and luxuriate in an
asphyxiating atmosphere, band against "the foreigners" in this
respect. We have a national reputation to keep up. We are the nation
of soap, of fresh air, of condescending discontent; and when we are on
the Continent every one else, including the native, is "a foreigner;"
we carry our nationality about with us like a camp-stool; we squat on
it; we are jealous of it; it is a case of "_Regardez, mais ne touchez
pas!_"
[Illustration: COMMERCIAL INSTINCT.
_Original Genius_ (_soliloquising_). "Lor, it 'id bin a crool Shame to
miss an Opportunity like this 'ere. The gov'nor oughter lemme 'ave Ten
Bob on that job!"]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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