Every bubble as crosses the tape afore busting counts one to that pair, And the pair as counts most wins the prize. They are timed by a hegg-boiler. There! It _wos_ all a pantermime, CHARLIE, to see 'ow them gurls scooted round, Jest like Japanese jugglers, a-fanning the bubbles, as _would_ 'ug the ground. Some gents wos fair frosts at the bizness; one good-'earted trim little toff Would blow with the bowl wrong end uppards. His pardner went pink and flounced off. He gurgled away like a babe with a pap-bottle, guggle--gug--gug! And I 'eard 'er a-giving 'im beans as 'e mizzled, much down in the mug. Owsomever, it ain't for amusements as 'Arrygate lays itself hout; So, dear boy, it's for doses and douches; and there it scores freely, no doubt, Wy, there's thirty-two Springs in the Bog Field--a place like a graveyard gone wrong-- Besides Starbeck, the Tewit, and others, all narsty, and most on 'em strong. Since Sir SLINGSBY discovered the first one, now close on three cent'ries ago, Wot a lush of mixed mineral muck these 'ere 'Arrygate Springs 'ave let flow! Well, ere's bully for Brimstone, my bloater, and 'ooray for 'Arrygate air! Wich 'as done me most good I don't know, and I'm scorched if I very much care! I know 'Arrygate girls cop the biscuit for beauty. They've cheeks like the rose, Their skin is jest strorberries and cream; it's the sulphur, dear boy, I suppose. As for me, I look yaller as taller alongside 'em CHARLIE, wus luck! I 'eard one call me saffron-faced sparrer, and jest as I thought 'er fair struck. I'd nail 'em, in time, I've no doubt, when I once got the 'ang of their style. There's a gal at the Montpellier Baths. Scissoree! 'ow I've tried for a smile, When she tips me my tannersworth! Shucks! she's as orty and stiff as yer please. Primrose Dames isn't in it for snubs with these arrygant 'Arrygatese! But I reckon my "Douche" is now due. Doctor BLACK's that pertikler, old man. These 'Arrygate doctors 'ave progrums--you've got to pan out to their plan. Up early, two swigs afore breakfust, and tubs when they tell yer's the rule. Well, the feller as flies to a Sawbones, and _don't_ toe the line is a fool. Reglar Doctor-Shop, 'Arrygate is; see their photos all over the town. Mine is doing me dollups of good; I'm quite peckish, and jest a bit brown. I'm making the most of my time, and a-laying in all I can carry. So 'ere ends this budget of brimstone and baths from your sulphur-soaked 'ARRY. * * * * * [Illustration: A FROG HE WOULD A-ROWING GO! A SAD SONG OF THE INTERNATIONAL BOAT RACE.