_Mr. Sibb. (unmasking)._ After all, you know, I don't see why we should go to any expense over a stuck-up, cross-grained chap like PORPENTINE. It's well-known he hasn't a good word to say for us Jerrymere folks, and considers himself above the lot of us! _Mr. Balch and Mr. Filk._ I'm bound to say there's a good deal in what SIBBERING says. PORPENTINE'S never shown himself what _I_ should call sociable. _Mr. Cocker._ I've never found him anything but pleasant myself, whatever he may be to others. I'm not denying he's an _exclusive_ man, and a _fastidious_ man, but he's been 'arshly treated, and _I_ should have thought this was an occasion--if ever there was one--for putting any private feelings aside, and rallying round him to show our respect and sympathy. But of course if you're going to let petty jealousies of this sort get the better of you, and leave me to do the 'ole thing myself, _I've_ no objection. I daresay he'll value it all the more coming from me. _Mr. Sibb._ Well, he _ought_ to, after the shameful way he's spoken of you to a friend of mine in the City, who shall be nameless. You mayn't know, and if not, it's only right I should mention it, that he complained bitterly of having to change his regular train on your account, and said (I'm only repeating his words, mind you) that Jerrymere was entirely populated by bores, but you were the worst of the lot, and your jabber twice a day was more than he _could_ stand. He mayn't have _meant_ anything by it, but it was decidedly uncalled for. _Mr. Cockcr. (reddening)._ I 'ope I'm above being affected by the opinion any man may express of my conversation--especially a cantankerous feller, who can't keep his temper under decent control. A feller who goes and breaks his umbrella over an unoffending official's 'ead like that, and gets, very properly, locked up for it! Jerrymere society isn't good enough for him, it seems. He won't be troubled with much of it in future--_I_ can assure him! Upon my word, now I come to think of it, I'm not sure he shouldn't be called upon for an explanation of how he came to be travelling without a ticket; it looks very much to me as if he'd been systematically defrauding the Company! _Mr. Filk._ Well, I didn't like to say so before; but that's been _my_ view all along! _Mr. Balch._ And mine. _Mr. Sibb._ Now perhaps you understand why we'd rather leave it to you to give him the arm-chair. _Mr. Cockcr._ _I_ give a man an arm-chair for bringing disgrace on the 'ole of Jerrymere! I'd sooner break it up for firewood! Whoever it was that first started all this tomfoolery about a testimonial, I'm not going to 'ave _my_ name associated with it, and if you'll take _my_ advice, you'll drop it once and for all, for it's only making yourselves ridiculous! [_His companions, observing that he is in a somewhat excited condition, consider it advisable to change the subject._ * * * * * OPERATIC NOTES.