shirt's all right; trousers a trifle short--but they'll let down; waistcoat--whew, must undo the buckle--hang it, it _is_ undone! I feel like a hooped barrel in it! Now the coat--easy does it. Well, it's _on_; but I shall have to be peeled like a walnut to get it off again.... Shoes? ah, here they are--pair of pumps. Phew--must have come from the Torture Exhibition in Leicester Square; glass slippers nothing to 'em! But they'll have to do at a pinch; and they _do_ pinch like blazes! Ha, ha, that's good! I must tell that to the Captain. (_He looks at himself in a mirror._) Well, I can't say they're up to mine for cut and general style; but they're passable. And now I'll go down to the Drawing Room and get on terms with all the smarties! [_He saunters out with restored complacency._ [Illustration: "I say, you know, that's rather smart, eh?"] * * * * * SOCIETY FOR THE ADVANCEMENT OF LITERATURE [Illustration] The first annual meeting of this society, which, as our readers will remember, has been in process of formation for some years past, was held yesterday. We cannot congratulate the society on its decision to exclude reporters. It is true that our representative, on seeking admission, was informed that his presence would be unnecessary, as members of the society, having for some time past done their own reviewing, intended for the future to report themselves. The public, however, whose eager interest in literature is sufficiently attested not only by the literary page of democratic newspapers, but by the columns which even reactionary journals devote to higher criticism and literary snippets--the public, we say, will not brook this absurd plea, and will refuse to accept any but an impartial report of a gathering such as was held yesterday. This we have obtained, and we now proceed to publish it for the benefit of the world. The meeting opened with a prayer of two thousand words specially written for the occasion by Mr. RICHARD L- G-LLI-NNE in collaboration with Mr. ROBERT B-CH-N-N. As this is shortly to be published in the form of a joint letter to the _Daily Chronicle_ it is only necessary to say at present that it combines vigour of expression with delicacy of sentiment and grace of style in the very highest degree. By the way, we may mention that the new Prayer-book of the Society is to be published by Messrs. E-K-N M-TTH-WS and J-HN L-NE, at the "Bodley Head," before the end of the year. It will be profusely illustrated by MESSRS. A-BR-Y B-ARD-L-Y and W-LT-R S-CK-RT, who have also designed for it a special fancy cover. Only three hundred copies will be issued. To return, however, to the meeting.