Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 107, September 29, 1894Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 107, September 29, 1894
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Tred._ She don't favour her ma, I will say _that_ for her. By the way,
who is the party they brought down with them? a youngish looking
chap--seemed a bit out of his helement, when he first come in, though
he's soon got over that, judging by the way him and your Lady RHODA,
Miss DOLMAN, was 'obnobbing together at table!
_Phill._ Nobody came down with _my_ ladies; they must have met him in
the bus, I expect. What is his name?
_Tred._ Why, he give it to me, I know, when I enounced him; but it's
gone clean out of my head again. He's got the Verney Chamber, I know
_that_ much; but what _was_ his name again? I shall forget my own next.
_Und. (involuntarily)._ In the Verney Chamber? Then the name must be
SPURRELL!
_Phill. (starting)._ SPURRELL! Why, _I_ used to---- But of course it
can't be _him_!
_Tred._ SPURRELL _was_ the name, though. (_With a resentful glare at_
UNDERSHELL.) I don't know how _you_ came to be aware of it, Sir!
_Und._ Why, the fact is, I happened to find out that--(_here he receives
an admonitory drive in the back from the_ Boy)--that his name _was_
SPURRELL. (_To himself._) I wish this infernal Boy wouldn't be so
officious; but perhaps he's right!
_Tred._ Ho, indeed! Well, _another_ time, Mr. HUNDERSHELL, if you
require information about parties staying with Us, p'r'aps you'll be
good enough to apply to me personally, instead of picking it up in some
'ole and corner fashion. (UNDERSHELL _controls his indignation with
difficulty_.) To return to the individual in question, Miss PHILLIPSON,
I should have said myself he was something in the artistic or littery
way; he suttingly didn't give me the impression of being a Gentleman.
_Phill. (to herself, relieved)._ Then it _isn't_ my JEM! I might have
known he wouldn't be visiting here, and carrying on with Lady RHODAS.
He'd never forget himself like that--if he _has_ forgotten me!
_Stept._ It strikes me he's more of a sporting character, TREDWELL. I
know when I was circulating with the cigarettes, and so on, in the hall
just now, he was telling the Captain some anecdote about an old
steeplechaser that was faked up to win a Selling Handicap, and it
tickled me to that extent I could hardly hold the spirit-lamp steady!
_Tred._ I may be mistook, STEPTOE. All _I_ can say is, that when me and
JAMES was serving cawfy to the ladies in the drawing-room, some of them
had got 'old of a little pink book all sprinkled over with silver
cutlets, and, rightly _or_ wrongly, I took it to 'ave some connection
with 'im.
_Und. (excitedly)._ Pink and silver! Might I ask--was it a volume of
poetry, called--er--_Andromeda_?
_Tred. (crushingly)._ That I did not take the liberty of inquiring, Sir,
as you might be aware if you was a little more familiar with the
hetiquette of good Serciety.
[UNDERSHELL _collapses_; Mr. ADAMS _enters, and steps into the
chair vacated by the Chef, next to_ Mrs. POMFRET, _with whom he
converses_.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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