"Before you finish your whiff and depart to dress for dinner," quoth the Baron, "just read through Mr. ESCOTT'S article in the _Fort-nightly_." If you lived in Literary Bohemia many years ago, it will revive pleasant memories, and if you didn't, it will interest those who did with whom, in conversation at dinner, you can start the subject. Bohemia exists always; only, as Mr. LAUDATOR TEMPORIS ACTI will, of course, sing, it was at its best in "The days when _we_ went gipseying A long time ago!" "Glad to see Mr. ESCOTT'S pen at work again," quoth the kindly BARON DE B.-W. * * * * * [Illustration: PROFESSIONAL INSTINCT. _Kindly Gentleman_ (_from True Blue Club_). "AND WHAT HAS BROUGHT YOU TO THIS DEPLORABLE CONDITION? DRINK?--GAMBLING?" _Gentleman of the Pavement_ (_spotting his man_). "NO, INDEED, SIR; MY MISFORTUNES ARE ENTIRELY ATTRIBUTABLE TO FREE TRADE, MONOMETALLISM, AND THE DEATH DUTIES." [_Immediate relief on a generous scale._ ] * * * * * MRS. A.'S AT HOME. _An awful night!_ I do believe it's snowing! Who from his "ain fireside" would wish to roam? Only a fool would go--and yet I'm going-- To Mrs. A.'s At Home! The burden of At Homes! The bore of dressing! I must be wielding razor, brush, and comb (The snow has almost stopped--Come, that's a blessing!) For Mrs. A.'s At Home. Why am I going? Well, to me the reason Looms large and clear as Paul's cathedral dome: The reason's--NANCY, whom I met last season At Mrs. A.'s At Home. Hi, hansom! Off we go! Although sweet NANCY Since then has vanished like a fairy gnome, Yet I shall see her (sweet conceit) in fancy At Mrs. A.'s At Home. "Thankee, my lord!"--he's earned that extra shilling, We've come along, the horse is flecked with foam-- Slowly upstairs I go, the rooms are filling At Mrs. A.'s At Home. Then--why, good heavens! No! It isn't fancy!-- "Can it be you? I heard you were in Rome. Just fancy meeting you"--the real NANCY!-- "At Mrs. A.'s At Home!" To-night and NANCY--rhyme excuses fiction-- Might, if I sang them, fill a ponderous tome: _A perfect night!_ I breathe a benediction On Mrs. A.'s At Home! * * * * * [Illustration: A DISTINGUISHED AMATEUR. "ACH! DAT IS A PUTIFUL ZONG, LATY PEACOCKE, AND YOU BRONOUNCE CHERMAN VERY VELL--POT VY DO YOU BLAY ZE AGGOMBANIMENT IN B NATURAL?" "THE SONG'S WRITTEN IN B NATURAL, HERR MAESTRO." "ACH ZO! ZEN VY DO YOU ZING ZE MELOTY IN B VLAT?" "OH, _REALLY_, HERR MAESTRO! I DON'T PRETEND TO BE A _PROFESSIONAL_, YOU KNOW. I ONLY SING JUST TO PLEASE MY FRIENDS!"] * * * * * "THE LIGHT FANTASTIC!"