* * * The London General Omnibus Company is appointing one lady and a number of men to act as interpreters and guides. Their costumes, we should say, will attract a considerable amount of attention, for the lady, we are told, will wear a braided frock coat and black skirt and straw-topped peak hat, while the men will work in double shifts. * * * By the way it is rumoured that several of our railway companies intend to follow the example of the L. G. O. C. and employ interpreters to translate to passengers the names of the railway stations as announced by porters and guards. * * * At the recent meeting of the British Medical Association at Aberdeen a doctor advocated the eating of onions and garlic. This should certainly produce an uninhabited area in one's immediate neighbourhood, and so render one less liable to catch infectious diseases. * * * "I know not," says Mr. ARNOLD BENNETT, "why I find an acrid pleasure in beholding mediocrity, the average, the everyday ordinary, as it is; but I do." Can it be, ARNOLD, because we are all attracted by our opposites? * * * We are authorised to deny the allegation that Lord GLADSTONE, when he was booed upon his arrival at Waterloo from South Africa, remarked gaily, "Ah, I see I have not done with my friends the Booers yet!" * * * It is nice to know in these days of lost reputations that Oriental hospitality, at any rate, shows no signs of decadence. A correspondent has come across the following announcement in a tailor's shop in Tokio:--"Respectable ladies and gentlemen may come here to have fits." * * * * * Illustration: "DO YER LOVE ME, 'ERB?" "LOVE YER, 'LIZA, I SHOULD JEST THINK I DOES. WHY, IF YER EVER GIVES ME UP I'LL MURDER YER! I CAN'T SAY MORE'N THAT, CAN I?" * * * * * COMMERCIAL CANDOUR. "The lasting delightful perfume of the age. One who can prove that the perfume of _Otto Mohini_ is not lasting for four days by putting five drops on the handkerchief will be rewarded Rs. 100 cash. Try only small tube and get the reward."--_Advt. in "The Hitavada."_ * * * * * "Dr. Roux, head of the Pasteur Institute, has made a communication to the Academy of Science showing microbes is not only possible, but would be far better." _Rangoon Gazette._ But we don't quite see what the Academy can do about it. * * * * * "MINIATURE & PORTRAIT PAINTING MR. ALFRED PRAGA, R.B.A., President of the Society of Manicurists." _Advt. in "The Studio."_ We know an artist whose work gives us the impression that he might be President of the Society of Chiropodists. * * * * * "Lord Provost Stevenson is proving a serious rival to Principal MacAlister as a linguist. Sir Daniel yesterday addressed public gatherings in English, Italian, and Spanish."