"Yes, you could do without the haunch, you know, and score off the butcher." "That's a sound idea. You're not so badly measled as I thought you were." "Oh," she said, "I shall soon be rid of them altogether." "To tell you the truth, I wish you'd hurry up." "Long live the counter-revolution!" "Oh, as long as you like," I said. "Have you given the children their medicine and taken their temperatures?" "I'm just off to do it," I said. R.C.L. * * * * * [Illustration: SCENE: _A lonely road somewhere in France._ _Diminutive Warrior_ (_suddenly confronted with ferocious specimen of the local fauna_). "LUMME! IF IT AIN'T THE REGIMENTAL COAT-OF-ARMS COME TO LIFE!"] * * * * * "The Wady Ghuzzeh, or river of Gaza, a stream-bed which makes no large assertion on the map. But it 'just divides the desert from the sewn.'" --_Sunday Paper_. Being, as you might say, a mere thread. * * * * * Extracts from an article entitled "London Sights: An Australian's Impressions":-- "When all is over and we are back where the coyote cries ... when the Rockies are looking down at us from their snowy heights, and the night-time silence steals across the fir-bordered foothills...."--_Sunday Times_. Yet what is all this to the longing of the Canadian for the nightly howl of the kangaroo and the song of the wombat flitting among the blue-gums in his native bush? * * * * * According to a French philosopher mankind is divided into two categories, _Les Huns et les autres_. * * * * * "Sydney, January 2. Concurrently with the inauguration of the new time schedule at 2 a.m. on Monday a violent earth tremor was experienced at Orange. An accompanying noise lasted about a half minute."--_Brisbane Courier_. Another family quarrel between [Greek: Kronos] and [Greek: Gê]. * * * * * "Petrograd, Wednesday, The Council of Workmen's Delegates has issued an appeal to the proletariat, which contains the following striking passage: We shall defend our liberty to the utmost against all attacks within and without. The Russian revolution will not quail before the bayca fwyaa, mfwyawayqawyqa."--_Dublin Evening Mail_. If that won't frighten it nothing will. * * * * * [Illustration: "YOU WOULDN'T THINK IT TO LOOK AT 'IM, BUT WHEN I SAYS ''ANDS UP,' 'E ANSWERS BACK IN PUFFICK ENGLISH, 'STEADY ON WITH YER BLINKIN' TOOTHPICK,' 'E SEZ, 'AND I'LL COME QUIET.'"] * * * * * OUR BOOKING-OFFICE. (_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)