Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 152, April 11, 1917Various
History
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 152, April 11, 1917
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
There is a story current, turning on these events, of a young German
officer and an official correspondence. It just possibly may be true, since
even among such a rotten lot there might conceivably have been one
tolerable fellow. The Higher Command had been much intrigued as to a church
window, wanting to know (in writing) exactly why and how it had been
broken; or rather, as it was the German Higher Command, exactly why and how
it had been allowed to remain unbroken. You know how these affairs develop
in interest and excitement as the correspondence passes down and down, from
one formation to another, and what an air of urgency and bitterness they
wear when they reach the last man. In this case the young German subaltern,
who had no one else below him on whom to put the burden of explaining in
writing, took advantage of his position, and wrote upon a slip, which he
attached to the top of the others: "To Officer Commanding British Troops.
Passed to you, please, as this town is now in your area...."
Probably the tale isn't true, for if the officer was a German he must have
had German blood in him, and if he had German blood in him there couldn't
be room for anything else, certainly not for a sense of humour.
We stayed longer than we should have done; this was an occasion upon which
one could not insist on the limit of ten handshakes per person. I was
delayed also by the Institutrice, who wanted to borrow my uniform, so that
she might put it on and so be in a position to start right off at once,
paying back. She meant it too, and I should not be surprised to hear that
she's been caught doing it by this time. Her mother was there in great
form. Asked for her opinion of the dear departed, she said she had already
told it to themselves and saw no reason to alter it. "They make war only on
women and children; they are _lâches_." My N.C.O. got out his
pocket-dictionary to discover the exact meaning of the word. She told us he
needn't trouble; it meant two months' imprisonment. She had a face like a
russet apple--a very nice russet apple, too.
We didn't get away before dark, and we found it very hard to discover our
way about new country when large hunks of it were missing altogether. One
of the party would walk on to find the way, and later I would go forth to
find him. We could see the road stretching away in front of us for
kilometres; but between us and it there would be twenty yards of nil.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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