"The undersigned begs to inform the public that a very superior cow will be slaughtered on the 20th evening and exposed on the morning of the 21st for sale."--_Madras Mail_. That ought to stop her swanking. * * * * * "CAMOUFLAGED ATTACK. "Paris, Thursday. "All the newspapers print long accounts of the new offensive, under the heading, 'Great British Victory,' and all agree in assigning the chief honours attack, and the new British method of organ-attack, and the new British method of arganising the offensive in secret."--_Provincial Paper_. And very well camouflaged, too. * * * * * LEAVES FROM A LONDON NOTE-BOOK. BY OUR MAN ABOUT TOWN. (WITH ACKNOWLEDGMENTS TO SOME OF OUR METROPOLITAN PENNY EVENING PAPERS.) SUGAR CARDS. A highly-placed official tells me that the discovery that a number of people move about from place to place, that servants sometimes leave their situations, and that households are consequently liable to variation in their personnel, is due to a very smart member of the Sugar Commission, who will be suitably decorated. This discovery, on the very eve of compulsory rationing in other commodities, will mean an immense saving of national funds. Instead of billions, only a few millions of cards will need to be destroyed--a very useful economy. A GREAT MAYFAIR EFFORT. The Mayfair Tableaux Association will shortly hold a Fancy Dress Exhibition of Really Beautiful War-workers. The subjects represented will range from CLEOPATRA to BOTTICELLI'S "Primavera," and from SALOME to the Sistine Madonna. Preliminary photographs are about to appear in the Society Press. The particular object of this great sacrifice in the cause of charity has not yet been determined upon, but will be announced in due course. THE SUBMARINE MENACE. No significance should be attached to recent statistics of torpedoed ships in view of public announcements to the effect that the submarine menace has been practically scotched. INTERNATIONAL BOLO. The British Parliamentary Branch of the International Bolo Club indignantly deny that they have received a single pony, or any less sum, from German sympathisers in support of Pacifist propaganda. They generously recognise that Germany's economical straits are even greater than ours, and they would not willingly, even for the sake of a common cause, put a strain upon the resources of their German friends. MAHENGE. The other day I consulted an old friend on the Imperial Staff as to the pronunciation of Mahenge, the scene of our latest victory in East Africa. From the evasive character of his reply I gathered that my inquiry was of the nature of an indiscretion. THE CABINET AND THE "VICIOUS CIRCLE."