Having given the Sergeant to understand that he was to blame for the Corporal's papers being in order, I allowed myself to be passed on. The Corporal followed me; he wanted an explanation. When we got outside the station I let him catch me up, because I thought he was entitled to one. "Will you allow me to ask why you did that, Sir?" he said very indignantly but not rudely. "You knew that I had my papers, Sir, and that they were in order." "Yes," I said. "But I knew that my own weren't." His cheeks suffused with the most jovial red I have ever seen. "In the very strictest confidence, Corporal," I said, "_I_ haven't any papers." I didn't know that a human laugh could be so loud. On the whole I think it was a good thing that we had arrived in Paris after closing time, since otherwise, in spite of my dislike of the stuff, I'm sure that three more bottles of the most expensive brand would have been cracked. I should have had to stand one; he would have positively insisted on standing two. Yours ever, HENRY. * * * * * [Illustration: _Skipper of Drifter (who has been fined thirty-five shillings for losing a pair of binoculars)._ "PROPER JUSTICE I CALLS IT; MY BROTHER-IN-LAW LOSES HIS WHOLE BLINKING DRIFTER AND YOU DON'T FINE 'IM A BLOOMING CENT."] * * * * * [Illustration: _Tommy._ "'E'S A WONDER AN' NO MISTAKE. I CAN'T TEACH MY OLD DAWG AT HOME TO DO ANYTHINK." _Pal._ "AH, BUT YER SEE, MATEY, YOU 'AVE TO KNOW MORE 'N A DAWG, OR YER CAN'T LEARN 'IM NUTHIN."] * * * * * A SIGN OF THE TIMES. "YOUNG LADY Wants post as Housekeeper to working man."--_Halifax Evening Courier_. * * * * * "Planers (large letters) Wanted, for machine tool work; good bonus; war work; permanent job."--_Daily Dispatch_. Pessimist! * * * * * "WHAT DISABLED SOLDIERS SHOULD KNOW. "That there is no such word as 'imossible' in his dictionary."--_Canadian Paper_. Correct. * * * * * "M. Polychromads, Green Chargé d'Affaires, has left London for the Hague."--_Sunday Times_. It is an unfortunate colour, but with a name like that he can always try one of the others. * * * * * "The canker of indiscipline and the wine of liberty have shaken the Russian Army to its foundations."--_"Times" Russian Correspondent_. While the tide of new life that was kindled by the torch of revolution seems destined to crumble into dust. * * * * * THE TRIUMPHAL PROGRESS.