"'Switch off. All right, contact.' "At the third attempt the engine remembered its manners and started up with a jerk. A few moments to get her running smoothly, a rapid test to see that she was 'giving her revs.' and the chocks, were waved away from the wheels. "Within twenty yards he was off the ground and, throttle wide open, climbing towards the little white dot thousands of feet above. "And all the time he was grumbling. "'What awful rot it is! I've about as much chance of reaching the blighter as ... Running my engine to bits as it is ... May be able to cut him off when he's dropped his eggs.' "Which is precisely what happened. The last gift had been thankfully received in a ploughed field beneath and the Hun was turning for home when the scout struggled to his level. "The watchers on the ground saw the small machine press determinedly towards the bigger and a faint crackle of gun-fire broke out. "It was answered by all the guns on board the enemy craft and the single-seater wavered undecidedly. "Then he got his adversary fairly in his ring sight again and' risking everything, fired burst after burst. "All at once the big machine heeled over and dived--a flash and a sudden sheet of flame from the engine and down dropped the raider, to dash to pieces in the French fields three miles below. "Ten minutes later the British machine slithered on to the ground and switched off in front of the sheds. "'By Jove, Bill,' said his friend, rushing up excitedly, 'that was the best show--' "'Not so much of it,' interposed the 'hero,' scrambling out of his seat. 'What about my tea? Did you look after my toast for me? No, might have known you wouldn't.'" * * * * * WHAT OUR POETS HAVE TO PUT UP WITH. "They who faced the terrors of the deep, Who guarded our snores-while we were asleep." _Scottish Paper_. * * * * * "Though his career was entirely that of a public servant, he had personality and that self-evident efficiency which mark a man out for promotion."--_Times_. That "though" is rather cynical. * * * * * [Illustration: "I SAY, TAXI, I'VE ONLY GOT ENOUGH CHANGE TO PAY THE EXACT FARE. D'YOU MIND TAKING A CHEQUE FOR THE TIP?"] * * * * * RECIPROCITY. [Discussing the unruliness of modern children, a correspondent in the Press suggests that parents might exchange offspring for educational purposes.] Hector, one thought alone forbade Your stout progenitor to squirm Through all the months the Huns essayed To pink his epiderm-- The thought that you, through what he'd done, Might find a better world, my son. Now must you do your bit for me, For, guided by the sage's lore, I mean to barter progeny With Brown, the man next door, And educate in place of you Bertram, his brazen-lunged Yahoo.