I, for my part, admire The snug domestic fire, The comfortable hearth, the glowing coals, Nor in the least aspire To emulate those strong heroic souls Who get up while it's dark And haste to chill ablutions in Hyde Park. It can't be very nice To break the solid ice And, like a walrus, plunge into the deep; Then jump out in a trice, Dissevering the icicles as you leap, Even though the after-glow Of virtue melts the circumjacent snow. And we of milder mould, And we who're growing old, Wish they would wash, like other folk, elsewhere; It makes us feel quite cold To think of them refrigerating there; We shiver in our beds; Our pitying molars chatter in our heads. * * * * * "THE DOVER PATROL. VINDICTIVE MEN AS PROGRAMME SELLERS."--_Times_. After what men have suffered from the flag-day sex, no wonder they get vindictive when they have a chance of retaliation. * * * * * "The causes of the engineers' strike in London are a little obscure, but the stoppage of the ten minutes allowed for tea before the 47-hour day was introduced brought the men out from one motor works."--_Provincial Paper_. The great objection to a day of this length is that it gives so little scope for overtime. * * * * * "The Association for the Betterment of the Highlands and Islands of the Free Church of Scotland have prepared and presented to the Secretary for Scotland a memorandum on the reconstruction of the Highlands."--_Scots Paper_. We have always thought that judicious thinning of the more congested views would help the tourist. * * * * * "The men who had watched the daily search set up a cheer, ffi---- ----fl."--_Sunday Paper_. We hope the cheer was more hearty than it appears at first sight. * * * * * A CONSULTATION. _Persons of the dialogue_: Arthur Pillwell, M.D., _a fashionable physician;_ Henry Swallow, _a patient. The scene is laid in_ Dr. Pillwell's _consulting-room--a solid room, heavily furnished. A large writing-table occupies the centre of the scene. There are a few prints on the walls; two bookcases are solidly filled with medical books._ Dr. Pillwell _is seated at the writing-table. He rises to greet his patient._ _Dr. P._ Good morning, Mr. ---- (_He looks furtively at a notebook lying open on the table_) Mr.--ah--Swallow.