Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 19, 1919Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 19, 1919
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
It transpired that the first day was unfortunate. The Colonel was
silently impolite throughout Mess and retired immediately afterwards.
The Major explained that the conditions had been adverse. The punt
leaked at the end depressed by the Colonel and the ground-bait had
been left behind. The wind was fierce and cutting, and the brandlings
had been upset into the luncheon-basket. In addition the Colonel's
reel had escaped into the river and had declined to give itself up
until the whole length of line had been hauled in; and, in leaning
over the side to reclaim it, his gold fountain-pen had vanished. Five
hooks had failed to return from the deep and two were left suspended
from inaccessible branches; Also in the Major's opinion there was not
a single fish in the river.
By breakfast the Colonel had regained his spirits. He commented on the
lack of support given him by the Major, and in his place invited the
Adjutant on the ground that he was probably less clumsy. He remarked
that the offensive had not yet opened and that the previous day had
been mainly devoted to a thorough reconnaissance of the whole sector.
He had reason to believe that the enemy was present in considerable
force.
The second day proved equally unfortunate. The Colonel took his dinner
in private, and the Mess orderly, who had dismally cut the two of
clubs in the kitchen, returned from his ministrations a complete
nervous wreck. The Adjutant explained that misfortune had followed
misfortune. They had barely settled down midstream, and he was in
the act of extracting a hook from the Colonel's finger with his
jack-knife, when the punt broke from its moorings and carried them
half-a-mile downstream. It was uncanny how the craft had contrived to
navigate four bends without giving an opportunity of landing. In the
afternoon they had fished from the bank, and the Colonel had fallen
asleep while the Adjutant mounted guard. The Adjutant protested that
it was not his fault that the float suddenly disappeared, or that the
Colonel, on being vigorously awakened by him, struck so violently
at what proved to be a dead branch that he lost his footing and
tobogganned heavily into the river, and was compelled to waste three
hours in the neighbouring hostelry taking precautions against a chill.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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