O blessed jargon of the mart! Though your commercial meaning's hid From me, a layman, to my heart You bring a soothing _nescio quid_; Amid the flux of strikes and plots Two things at present stand like stone: In mines the goodness of their spots, In oils their healthy undertone. * * * * * Extract from a recent story:-- "Noiselessly we crept from the tent. The sands, the sea, the cliffs, were bathed in silver white by a glorious tropical moon. Noiselessly we levelled it to the ground, rolled it up, and carried it to the boat." And that night the Gothas were foiled. * * * * * "The subject of a war memorial was considered at a St. Sidwell's, Exeter, parish meeting. Many suggestions were offered, among them one that the present seating in the parish church should be replaced by plush-covered tip-up seats, such as are in use at kinemas and other places of entertainment."--_Western Morning News_. If the suggestion is adopted it is presumed that the name of the church will be altered to St. Sitwell. * * * * * [Illustration: _Father Murphy_. "MIKE, COME HERE AND HOLD THE MULE FOR A FEW MINUTES." _Mike_ (_not stirring_). "IT'S SORRY I AM, FATHER, BUT I DO BE DRAWIN' THE OUT-OF-WORK MONEY, AND I DARE NOT HOULD HER. BUT I'LL SAY 'STAND' TO HER FOR YOU, FATHER, IF I SEE HER ANYWAYS UNAISY."] * * * * * OUR BOOKING-OFFICE. (_BY MR. PUNCH'S STAFF OF LEARNED CLERICS._)