Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, January 29, 1919Various
History
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, January 29, 1919
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
"SHANGHAI MUNICIPAL COUNCIL POLICE FORCE.--Police recruits are
now required. Applicants must be unmarried, of good physique,
with sound teeth, about 20 to 25 years of age, not less than
57 ft. 10 in. in height."--_Weekly Paper_.
* * * * *
"Lloyd's agent at Chriseiansund telegraphs that
wreckage marked 'Wilson Line' drifted ashore near
Switzerland."--_Provincial Paper_.
Following the WILSON line the seas appear to be already behaving with
unusual freedom.
* * * * *
"'George Eliot' (Mary Ann Evans), the gifted Warwickshire
authoress, who wrote 'Adam Bede' and several other popular
works."--_Daily Telegraph_.
We have noticed the name from time to time, and we are glad to know
who "GEORGE ELIOT" was.
* * * * *
From a "multiple shop" catalogue:--
"SMOKING ROOM.--The decorations are well worth a special note,
and are quite unique of their kind, being without a match
anywhere."
Surely not "unique." We know a lot of smoking-rooms equally matchless.
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE FIRST GERMAN VICTORY.
[The German Elections have resulted in a signal defeat for the
Extremists.]]
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Hostess_ (_to small guest, who is casting lingering
glances at the cakes_). "I DON'T THINK YOU CAN EAT ANY MORE OF THOSE
CAKES, CAN YOU, JOHN?"
_John_. "NO, I DON'T THINK I CAN. BUT MAY I STROKE THEM?"]
* * * * *
A NEW SCHOOL.
An evening newspaper informs its readers that arrangements are being
made for "a school for M.P.'s"--"a weekly meeting of Unionist M.P.'s
new to Parliamentary life, who will receive instruction in the forms
of the House. They will be taught how to address the SPEAKER, how to
frame a question," and so forth.
This intelligence is of particular interest in that it conveys an
admission that our new M.P.'s do not know everything.
Interviewed by a correspondent, Mr. Raleigh Quawe, the able young
educationist, who, it is understood, is watching the experiment with
some concern, said, "While I do not wish to seem to be giving away
too much to the gloom of youth, I cannot help feeling that the school
may be run on wrong lines unless the greatest care is exercised.
Will the opportunity be taken for testing methods which have been so
disastrously absent hitherto from our public school system? I would
urge those in authority to put away the old formulæ, and to ensure
the introduction of a right spirit in the school by the appointment of
young masters endowed with vision and enthusiasm.
"I hope that the worship of sport will not be encouraged. I was never
one who believed that our battles have been won on the playing-fields
of Westminster. I am confident that I am not alone in the hope that
the old games at Westminster will be abandoned.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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