His nerve is gone, and he is marooned at Salonica. He cannot face the overland route, and he cannot get home all the way by sea just yet. In spite of all his endeavours he cannot become a naturalised Greek and stay there, because of linguistic difficulties. But what he wants to know is, why can't the medical authorities recognise "leave-shock" as a disease and send him home by hospital ship? * * * * * [Illustration: _First Girl_. "AN' YER ACTCHERLY MEAN TER SAY THEM BOOTS COST FIFTEEN SHILLIN'?" _Second Girl_. "AH, BUT THEY'RE WORF IT--THEY SQUEAK!"] * * * * * "The King has awarded a Knight Commandership of the Bath to Lieutenant-Colonel ----, C.B., in charging customers excessive prices for milk by giving short measure."--_Provincial Paper_. We should have thought the Pump would been more suitable than the Bath. * * * * * [Illustration: SPREAD OF THE "DAZZLE" CULT.] * * * * * LABOUR NOTES. A threat was recently made by the representatives of the miners that industrial action would be taken unless the Government at once withdrew all troops from Russia and abandoned conscription. There has been, it appears, an unfortunate misunderstanding as to the exact meaning of the term "industrial action." On Sunday a meeting of protest against the miners' proposal was held under the auspices of The United Brotherhood of Worshipful Lead-Swingers and Affiliated Trades. Violent attacks were made by several speakers upon the Miners' leaders, and serious disruption in the Labour World seemed imminent. But when it was authoritatively explained that "industrial action," instead of meaning work, as was supposed, was a euphemistic term for striking, harmony reigned once more. It was, however, unanimously resolved that in future the expression "industrial inaction" be always used in such connection, as "action" was a word repugnant to all right-thinking Lead-Swingers, and, anyhow, calculated in such a context to give rise to confusion of thought. * * * * *