Now men discussed, with glee or dolour, The question of the Creature's colour. "Black as my hat," cries one, "_I_ know." "Nay!" shouts another, "white as snow!" Whether the thing revealed should prove To ape the Raven or the Dove, Was matter of dispute most furious; Angry were most, and all were curious. At last arrived the eventful day When from the bag the thing must crawl, And lo! the Creature's tint was _grey_, Which disappointed all. But though Truth brings a brief confusion To obstinate foregone conclusion, Prejudice, routed most dis_mally_, Will quickly to Unreason rally. And so the one side would remark That for a grey 'twas wondrous _dark_; The other side did more than hint _They_ never saw so _light_ a tint; "Deep iron-grey!" said one, "Oh, stuff!" Another cried at most a buff! "In tint below, in hue above, 'Tis little deeper than a Dove! In fact, looked at in a strong light, 'Tis scarce distinguishable from white!" "_White!_" yelled a third, with rage half throttled, "With jet-black streaks 'tis thickly mottled. If not pure Raven, all must own No Magpie hath a sootier tone!" And so the rival parties raged and wrangled; Judgment considered whilst the bigots jangled, And the great bulk of _them_ 'twas sad to find, Wore party-coloured specs., or else were colour-blind! * * * * * [Illustration: GARRICK THEATRE.] The Hare Apparent in a New Pair of Spectacles. * * * * * [Illustration: ONLY A DROP!] _Shareholder._ "HALLO! I DON'T SEEM TO BE GETTING MUCH OUT OF THIS! WHAT'S THE MATTER?" _Standard._ "MATTER? THERE'S A LEAKAGE SOMEWHERE!" * * * * * ALL FOR THE SAKE OF THE ARMY! _From Mr. C. Bounder to Mr. T. Tenterfive._ DEAR TOMMY,--I say, can't you give me a leg up, to get the Government to adopt my confounded pop-guns? The foreigners don't seem to see them much, and, hang it all! a true-hearted Johnnie should give his native land the first chance. Thine ever, CHARLES BOUNDER. _From Mr. T. Tenterfive to Mr. C. Bounder._ DEAR CHARLEY,--I'm afraid I'm not of much use. Send in application about your pop-guns, and I will look after it as much as can. You mustn't expect much, as the Department has a way of knocking a thing about for months--sometimes years--and then quietly shelving it. Hope to see you soon. Thine ever, THOMAS TENTERFIVE. _Report of Ordnance Committee, to be forwarded to the Adjutant-General._ We have examined the Bounder Patent Ironclad Pocket Revolving Cannonette, and consider it a weapon that might possibly be introduced into the Service with advantage, if the cost of production is not excessive. _Report of Adjutant-General, to be forwarded to Quartermaster-General._ I enclose report of Ordnance Committee of which I approve. However, as the matter involves a financial question, your opinion thereon would be of great value.