_AEsthetic Party (looking over Furnished House)._ "A--I'M AFRAID, MY LOVE, THAT THIS IS THE KIND OF DINING-ROOM--A--IN WHICH ONE WOULD FEEL THAT ONE OUGHT TO DINE AT SIX O'CLOCK!!!"] * * * * * "NOT SUCH A FOOL AS HE LOOKS." _Leo Britannicus, loquitur_;-- GOOD Gentlemen both, you're on opposite tacks! Well, your plans you are perfectly welcome to try on. They talk of the patience of lambs, or park hacks; They're not in it, my lads, with an elderly Lion. A Lion, I mean, of the genuine breed, And not a thin-skinned and upstart adolescent. Dear me! did I let everybody succeed In stirring me up, or in making things pleasant, By smoothing me down in a flattering style, I'd have, there's no doubt, a delectable time of it. You think I look drowsy, and smile a fat smile; Well, what if I do? Where's the very great crime of it? A Lion, you know, is not all roar and ramp, So, STANLEY my hero, why worry and chivey? Mere blarney won't blind me; I'm not of that stamp; So don't hope to hypnotise _me_, good CAPRIVI. Why, bless you, my boys, long before you were cubbed I was charged, by your betters, with being too lazy; But rivals have found, when outwitted or drubbed, That a calm waiting game is not always so crazy. In Indian jungles, American plains, And far Eastern wilds, they have fancied me "bested," Because, when hot rivals were hungry for gains, I kept my eyes open, and patiently rested. A stolid and sleepy expression _will_ steal At times, I'm aware, o'er my leonine features; But, when the time's ripe, my opponents may feel I'm _not_ the most easily humbugged of creatures. In North as in South, in the East as the West, Opponents _have_ planted their paws down before me. But where are they now, boys? _J'y suis, j'y reste!_ Staying power is the thing; so don't bully and bore me. I hear you, my STANLEY, I hear you and mark; To snub you for patriot zeal were ungracious; But--well, after all, on your Continent Dark My footprints are plain, and my realm's pretty spacious. I don't mean to say that a purblind content My power should palsy, my policy dominate, And Congos and Khartoums that pay cent. per cent. Are tempting, but arrogant haste I abominate. My "prancing proconsuls" not _always_ are right, Whose first and last word for old Leo is "collar!" I'm not going to flare up like fury and fight Every time someone else wins an acre or dollar. But if you imagine I'm out of the hunt Every time I take breath, you are vastly mistaken: I know you're a brick, and like language that's blunt; Well, Lions sleep lightly, and readily waken!