* * * * * CARDINAL MANNING'S PRECEDENCE. It does not need heraldic lore The Cardinal's place to find. Of course he'll always come before The ones who are behind. * * * * * THE PHAGOCYTE. _(The Story of a Blood Feud.)_ [A microscopist has found an organism called the Phagocyte in the blood, which pursues and devours the Bacilli.] Strange the tale that Science tells. Here are some devouring cells: Ever watchful night and day, They the vile Bacillus slay; Wot we well he fears the bite Of the guardian Phagocyte. Hour by hour the fight goes on, Till the silent battle's won; Vainly do Bacilli shirk When their deadly foe's at work; Every microbe faints with fright At the fearsome Phagocyte. Should the Phagocyte not keep Faithful ward, but go to sleep; Then Bacillus, in high glee, Works his will on you and me; Danger would be ours to-night, But for that same Phagocyte. Such a tale of Science seems Like the offspring of wild dreams; Fiction surely, in good sooth, Can invent no tale like truth. Stranger story none could write Than this of the Phagocyte. The Astronomer descries Worlds on worlds beyond our eyes; 'Neath the microscope weird things Erst unseen whirl round in rings; Hence it is that we indite Stanzas to the Phagocyte. * * * * * [Illustration: "SHADOWED!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A SPECULATIVE OFFER. _Driver._ "NOW, TOM, WHEN WE ARRIVE AT THE TURN, I'LL SELL YOU THE DOG-CART FOR A SOV!"] * * * * * MR. PUNCH'S SWIM ROUND THE WORLD. _(From his own Prophetic Log-book.)_ _Herne Bay._--The weather being extremely favourable, I jumped off the end of the new pier, and, getting the benefit of the flood tide, passed the Nore and inspected Southend. Swimming quite easily, assisted by one or two short rests. _Margate._--Beached this popular seaside place a few hours later. Swam out of sight of the sands to rid myself of a view of the excursion riff-raff thereon congregated. Sea completely smooth, but cold. Took a nip of ----'s English Cognac. _Ramsgate._--Very pleased to find myself abreast of the Royal Crescent, which seemed delightful. Cape Grisnez still bearing N.E. by E. Munched one of ----'s excellent Birchrod Biscuits. _Dover._--Just had a good long rest in front of Clarence Lawn, which glistened in the sunlight. Greatly refreshed after a drink of ----'s Essence of Gravy beef. _Calais._--A shower of rain came on at this point. However, one of ----'s excellent umbrellas kept my head dry, and, being easy to hold, did not prevent me from swimming and writing up my log. _Gibraltar._--I felt very fatigued going through the Bay of Biscay, but recovered much of my strength off the fortress by sucking one of ----'s capital Kill-cough Lozenges.