I am trying _very hard_ (should it come to anything) to be present at the _last scene of all!_ Wouldn't that be _lovely_? I should have to be at the place, though, at _ten minutes to eight o'clock!_ I don't think I should go to bed that night _at all!_ If I did, I am _sure_ I should not sleep! It would be so very, _very_ interesting! And now, my _dearest_, good-bye. Your ever _most_ affectionate friend, LUCRETIA. * * * * * "MINE EASE AT MY CLUB."--In its most useful and instructive theatrical column last Sunday's _Observer_ (the only Observer of a Sunday in London!) inserted this notice:-- "Mr. H.A. JONES is to read a paper at the Playgoers' Club, Henrietta Street, Tuesday next." Why announce it? Why not let the hard-worked HENRY AUTHOR JONES read his paper at his Club in peace and quietness? Very hard on poor HENRY DRAMATIC AUTHOR JONES, if he can't have a few minutes of peace (not "piece," _bien entendu_) to himself. Leave him alone to take his ease at his Club. * * * * * UNSATISFACTORY FOR LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS.--At a recent meeting of Anarchists at New Jersey some were arrested, but MOST escaped. * * * * * [Illustration: A LAMENT FROM THE NORTH. "AND THEN THE WEATHER'S BEEN SO BAD, DONALD!" "OU AY, SIR. ONLY THREE FINE DAYS--AND TWA OF THEM SNAPPIT UP BY THE SAWBATH!"] * * * * * THE "LAIDLY WORM" OF LONDON; _Or, The Great Slum Dragon and Little Master County Council_. ["The Worm (at first neglected) grew till it was too large for its habitation.... It became the terror of the country, and, among other enormities, levied a daily contribution ... in default of which it would devour both man and beast.... Young LAMBTON was extremely shocked at witnessing the effects of his youthful imprudence, and immediately undertook the adventure."--_Legend of "The Lambton Worm," as related by Surtees._] Old stories tell how Hercules At Lerna slew a "Dragon;" And the "Lambton Worm" (told by SURTEES) The Durham men still brag on. How the "Laidly Worm" was made to squirm Old legends tell (they _can't_ lie!); And of MORE, of More-hall, when, "with nothing at all," He slew the Dragon of Wantley. Our Dragon here is a bigger beast Than LAMBTON slew, or MORE did; On poor men's bodies he doth feast, And ill-got gold long hoarded. He hath iron claws, and from his jaws Foul fumings are emitted. The folks, his prey, who cross his way, Are sorely to be pitied. Have you not heard how the Trojan horse Held seventy men inside him? _This_ Dragon's bigger, and of such force That none may rein or ride him. Men hour by hour he doth devour, And would they with him grapple, At one big sup he'll gobble them up, As schoolboys munch an apple.