PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. VOL. 99. October 18, 1890. HOW IT'S DONE. _A HANDBOOK TO HONESTY._ NO. 11.--THE STRAIGHT "TIP." SCENE--_Sanctum of "Large Wholesale House." Present, one of the_ Principals, _a pompous personage, with imposing watch-chain, and abundant space for it to meander over, and a sleekly subservient_ "Head of Department." Principal _looks irritated_, Head of Department _apprehensive, the former angrily shuffling some papers, the latter nervously "washing his hands with invisible soap, in imperceptible water._" _Principal_. Well, Mr.--er--er--SCROOP, we--er--my partners and self, are not quite satisfied with the way in which things are going in--er--in your department. _Head of Department_. Indeed, Sir. Sorry to hear that, Sir. May I ask, Sir, in--er--in what particular I have--er--failed to give complete satisfaction. (_Aside._) On the screw again, the old skinflint--I know him. [Illustration] _Principal._ Well, in point of fact, the profits on your branch have lately been very--have seemed--er--have been by no means--what we could wish, Mr. SCROOP, what we could wish, Sir. _H. of D._ Really, Sir, I--ah, am grieved to hear it, for, upon my word, I hardly know-- _Principal_ (_abruptly_). There must be cutting down somewhere--I say _somewhere_, Mr. SCROOP--_where_, I must leave to you. By the way, it seems to me that PUDDICOMBE's prices are a bit high for a beginner in the trade as he is. I think his "lines" ought to run a little lower--eh? _H. of D._ Well, Sir, I've suggested it to him myself, but he protested there was hardly a margin left. However, since you name it, Sir, I'll see what I can do with him. _(Aside._) Ruthless old grinder, _that's_ his game, is it? Wants a few "extra" pounds to play with, and means squeezing them out of PUDDICOMBE. Poor PUDDICOMBE, I've already put the screw on him pretty tightly. However, I must give it another turn, I suppose. SCENE II.--Head of Department _and_ PUDDICOMBE, _a hard-working, struggling manufacturer, who has schemed and screwed for years to keep in with the Big House._ _Puddicombe_. Upon my word, Mr. SCROOP, I can't--I really can't, knock off another quarter per cent. It's a tight fight already, and I _can't_ do it. _H. of D._ (_airily_). All right, PUDDICOMBE my boy,--as you please. Plenty who will, you know. _Puddicombe_. Really, Mr. SCROOP, I don't see how they can-- _H. of D._ (_rudely_). That's _their_ business. I only know they _will_, and jump at it. _Puddicombe_ (_hesitatingly_). But--er--I thought, when I made that little arrangement with you, a year ago, about the trifling bonus to you, you know, I thought you as good as promised--