Spending his boasted gifts of Tongue and Brains In Party spouting. Swearing potent charm is In grubbing muck-rake Money on the Mart, Or squandering it on Turf, or Gambling Table. Squabbling o'er the Morality of Art, Or fighting o'er the Genesis of Fable. You'll find him--as a Frank--in comic rage, Mouthing mad rant, fighting preposterous duels, Scattering ordures o'er Romance's page, And decking a swine's snout with Style's choice jewels. You'll see him--as a Teuton--trebly taxed, Mooning 'midst metaphysical supposes; Twirling a huge moustache, superbly waxed, And taking pride in slitting comrades' noses. You'll meet him--as a Muscovite--dead set On making civic life a sombre Hades, Shaking a knife with tyrant's blood red-wet, Or--aping "Paris-goods" in art, dress, ladies. You'll spy him--as a Yankee--gassing loud About his pride, and yet chin-deep in snobbery; Leaving State matters to corruption's crowd, And justifying (literary) robbery. Whilst as a Briton! Bless us, 'twould take time To picture _Homo_ in his guise Britannic. Here he is making a fine art of crime, There he is fussing in a Puritan panic; Here with MCMUCK he plays the prurient spy, And there with OSCAR in a paroxysm Of puerile paradox spreads to Cultchaw's eye The fopperies of "Artistic Hedonism"! Oh, EVANS, noting Man (_not_ Tertiary) In Church or State, the Studio or the Tavern, One wonders--not was he contemporary With Danish Kjökkenmöddings or Kent's Cavern,-- No, thinking of his work with Swords, Tongues, Pens, Of most of which Wisdom would make a clearance, One wonders whether _Homo Sapiens_ Has really truly _yet_ made his appearance! * * * * * [Illustration: COLLAPSE OF "CORNER MEN." (_As understood by Our Christy Minstrel Artist in Black and White._) [Mr. ---- was a prominent operator on the Market, in connection with an attempted great "Cotton Corner." ... The Corner ended in a collapse.]] * * * * * OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.