Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 02, April 9, 1870Various
General
Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 02, April 9, 1870
Various
American wit and humor -- Periodicals
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THE UMBRELLA. A VIEW OF THE SHADY SIDE OF LIFE.
A ripe pippin falling upon the head of Sir ISAAC NEWTON (a clear case of
hard cider on the brain) suggested the laws of gravitation. An elderly
countryman passing my window this clear bright day, attended by his
faithful umbrella, suggested the following reflections.
The term Umbrella comes from the Latin _umbra_, a shade--the whole
signifying "keep shady."
This definition well describes the nature of the article; for, as it
undoubtedly "keeps shady" in fine weather when the sun is fervent, so it is
apt to "keep shady" in rainy weather, when most wanted.
It is as difficult to say when the umbrella came, or where it came from, as
it is to tell where it goes to. Rumor hath it, however, that it came in
(that is, out of the rain) with NOAH. The story (as given us by an
antiquarian relative) says that when the Ark was built the camelopard was
forgotten, and it was found necessary to cut a hole in the roof to
accommodate the animal's neck. This done, SHEM sat upon the roof and held
an umbrella. SHEM thus _raised_ the umbrella. Then our further
question follows, Where did he raise it? Evidently he raised the umbrella
on the Ark.
These theories seem to us to be entitled to serious consideration; and
certainly it is a reasonable belief that, as the present suffering from the
high price of clothing is due to the sin of our first parents, so the
umbrella is the curse entailed by royalty, coming in with the First Reign
spoken of in history.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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