It's so in coal-mines, so in mills; It's so on steamboats, too; We're killed by hundreds, every year: But what's a man to do? These harpies make our laws for us-- Or do so through their tools: No doubt we seem to all the world A wretched pack of fools! We are so busy! We've _no time_ To see that all is right! We'll give the danger all our thoughts-- The moment its in sight! Cheap iron and cheap souls, my friend, Have cursed us all along. But what possesses you, good friend? I'm sure there's nothing wrong! _[The Simpleton from the Wilderness is terribly excited.]_ "I warn 'em not to serve _me_ so! They'll rue it, if they do! No axle, wheel, nor rail must break; No bridge must let me through! No other train must smash up ours; No culvert fall away; The scaly boiler mustn't burst; And here cows mustn't stray! "Conductors' watches _must_ keep time; Switch-'tenders _must_ "know beans," And engineers keep wide awake And know what duty means: And (in particular) no fiend Must take into his head To throw my train off down a bank For spite, or even bread! "What! do these dreadful things go on That companies may thrive? Is _profit_ the sole living thing They care to keep alive? Then, fellow-citizen, rouse up! For you and I are kings! Let us decree-and straightway _have_ A different state of things!" ["Well, you 'decree' it; and when it's done, please let me know," remarks the _Misanthropic Traveller._] * * * * * Sugar-Cane. The friends of WILLIAM TWEED, in presenting a cane to him the other evening, desired to show the Young Democracy how many there are who Stick to him. * * * * * [Illustration: THE GREAT NATIONAL GAME. OUR COLORED BROTHER. "HI YAH! STAN' BACK DAR; IT'S DIS CHILE'S INNIN'S NOW."] * * * * * TUTTI TREMANDO!