The lovely city of Chicago, which needs about twenty sheriffs to keep it in order, at the latest date had none at all; for the gentleman holding that office by law, in sheer despair (and some debt) has absconded, actually leaving a man to be hung, who was not hung, do you see, because there was nobody to hang him. Plenty of rope there was, to be sure, and a most beautiful gallows--but no sheriff! Of course, the thing came to a stand--perhaps it would not be proper to say a Dead stand--and the embarrassed Governor was obliged to commute the sentence! The creditors of the missing officer made a great complaint, but the Man who Wasn't Hung did not find the least fault. This shows the different views which the human mind may take of the same transaction. * * * * * Municipal Competition. Poor New-York! We thought that there were some things in which she could not merely not be beaten, but in which also she was secure even from competition. But the envious will never allow us to rest upon our hardly-earned laurels. Will it be believed that they have actually discovered and inaugurated a Wickedest Man in Cincinnati? He is called COLLINS, and must be a descendant of the COLLINS who wrote an Ode on the Passions; for all the bad ones this Cincinnati COLLINS has in great perfection. His Rage especially is beautiful. First, he knocks down his fellow-creatures. Secondly, when the police are sent to capture him, he knocks down the police. He is in jail, however; and we would suggest a Convention of the Wickedest Men in all parts of the country to take measures for his release. * * * * * Origin of the Mississippi. The contests for supremacy between Chicago and St. Louis have banished every particle of modesty from both cities, and each now considers itself to be the Centre of the Universe. Geographers may not heretofore have understood the origin of the Mississippi River, but the St. Louis _Democrat_ throws a great deal of light upon it. "We have been visited," says that sheet, "by heavy showers. The rain poured down heavily all night, flooding the gutters and adding to the volume of the river." It thus appears that this noble stream depends mainly for its water upon the gutters of St. Louis. Will these not, however, be rather damp resting-places for Members of Congress, should the Capital be removed to St. Louis? * * * * * The Repeater's Idea of Voting by Ballot. All Stuff.