Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 11, June 11, 1870 — John Shaqi
Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 11, June 11, 1870Various
General
Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 11, June 11, 1870
Various
American wit and humor -- Periodicals
The present residence of the successful Historian is Begad's Hill, New
Jersey, and, if not existing in SHAKSPEARE'S time, it certainly looks
old enough to have been built at about that period. Its architecture is
of the no-capital Corinthian order; there are mortgages both front and
back, and hot and cold water at the nearest hotel. From the central
front window, which belongs to the author's library, in which he keeps
his Patent Office Reports, there is a fine view of the top of the porch;
while from the rear casements you get a glimpse of blind-shutters which
won't open. It is reported of this fine old place, that the present
proprietor wished to own it even when a child; never dreaming the
mortgaged halls would yet be his without a hope of re-selling.
Although fully thirty years of age, the owner of Begad's Hill Place
still writes with a pen; and, perhaps, with a finer thoughtfulness as to
not suffusing his fingers with ink than in his more youthful moments of
composition. He is sound and kind in both single and double harness;
would undoubtedly be good to the Pole if he could get there; and,
although living many miles from the city, walks into his breakfast every
morning in the year. Let us, however,
"No longer seek his virtues to disclose,
Nor draw his frailties from their dread abode."
but advise PUNCHINELLO'S readers to peruse the "Mystery of Mr. E.
DROOD," for further glimpses of Mr. ORPHEUS C. KERR.
* * * * *
~The Fall of Man at the Falls~.
It is a very lamentable fact that the married people of Niagara have not
attained even the dignity and comfort of insanity. A paragraph informs
us that "The Niagara hotels have already forty-seven men trying to look
as if married for years, and who only succeed in resembling imbeciles."
To a Niagara tourist this must be an Eye-aggravating spectacle. But,
fortunately, none of this class of the Double-Blest will shoot anybody.
They don't look as if they had been married long! They are imbecile, not
insane!
* * * * *
~Green and Red~.
The _Southern Cell_ proposes that the Fenians shall make a new Ireland
of Winnipeg. Except on the principle of Hibernating, PUNCHINELLO cannot
discover why his Irish fellow-citizens are ambitious to winter in the
Red River country. Wouldn't Greenland do as well, and wear better?
* * * * *
~TAKE CARE OF THE WOUNDED~
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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