more, will you not?"
The girl made no reply. A feeling of shame had gradually stolen over
Bertram as he spoke, and he had tried in vain to weaken it by
concluding with a semi-humorous turn. Now this feeling grew intensified
by Erna's silence. How had, it been possible for him to forget himself
so far as to reveal to a young girl, one almost a child still, one
without comprehension for such sad, ugly, painful experiences, the
deepest secret of his heart--a secret which he had trained himself to
pass by, as it were, with his own face turned away? And he had told of
this, to a girl who stood to the object of his vehement denunciation in
the peculiarly tender and delicate relation of pupil! How mean, how
ignoble of him! He had acted like a raw, immature lad! He wished
himself a thousand miles away; he cursed his want of determination,
inasmuch as he might have left the place abruptly an hour ago, and thus
have escaped all this horrible confusion. Now he must needs depart at
once, this very evening, if possible without seeing, without speaking
to, a soul; most certainly without entering upon any explanation
whatever. He had just tasted the delight of such explanations, and it
would be long before he lost the bitter after-taste of them!...
They were quite cleat of the wood now, and were approaching--walking
across some meadow land--a tiny gate in the thick old wall, which led
to the courtyard.
Suddenly Erna said, "And you have told nobody all this?"
"No," he answered; and it cost him a curious struggle to get the one
brief word--out.
They passed through the tiny gate; it was almost dark in the yard now.
Before the entrance to the house stood a large open travelling
carriage; servants were removing the belongings of the travellers who
had already alighted. Through the main gate, on the opposite side, a
cart, laden with the heavier articles of luggage, was entering.
"Uncle Bertram," whispered Erna.
Just as they were about to cross the threshold of the tiny gate she had
seized his hand with gentle pressure. He had involuntarily stopped.
Again she was gazing up at him, but not now, as before in the wood,
with a stern expression. Was it a reflection of the radiance of the
young moon, just then rising above the gloom which was enfolding the
buildings around--or could it be tears that glistened in the great
eyes?
"You want to leave us, Uncle Bertram?"
"Who told you so?"
"It matters not. You want to leave us?"
"Yes."
"Stay! Pray, stay--for my sake!"
She dropped the hand which she had clasped until now, and hurried
across the yard to the mansion-house, while he ascended the stairs to
the side wing where his own rooms were situated, his whole soul full of
the image of this wondrous girl, whose words, whose looks, had so
potent a spell over him, that he no longer seemed to have a will of his
own as against hers.
IV.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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