American fiction -- 20th century; Bildungsromans; World War, 1914-1918 -- United States -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
He had a long afternoon of anguishes, these becoming most violent when
he tried to face the problem of his future course toward Milla. He did
not face it at all, in fact, but merely writhed, and had evolved nothing
when Friday evening was upon him and Milla waiting for him to take her
to the “band concert” with “Alb and Sade.” In his thoughts, by that
time, this harmless young pair shared the contamination of his own
crime, and he regarded them with aversion; however, he made shift to
seek a short interview with Albert, just before dinner.
“I got a pretty rotten headache, and my stomach's upset, too,” he said,
drooping upon the Paxton's fence. “I been gettin' worse every minute.
You and Sadie go by Milla's, Albert, and tell her if I'm not there by
ha'-pas'-seven, tell her not to wait for me any longer.”
“How do you mean 'wait'?” Albert inquired. “You don't expect her to come
pokin' along with Sadie and me, do you? She'll keep on sittin' there at
home just the same, because she wouldn't have anything else to do, if
you don't come like she expects you to. She hasn't got any way to _stop_
waitin'!”
At this, Ramsey moaned, without affectation. “I don't expect I _can_,
Albert,” he said. “I'd like to if I could, but the way it looks now,
you tell her I wouldn't be much surprised maybe I was startin' in with
typhoid fever or pretty near anything at all. You tell her I'm pretty
near as disappointed as she's goin' to be herself, and I'd come if I
could--and I _will_ come if I get a good deal better, or anything--but
the way it's gettin' to look now, I kind o' feel as if I might be
breaking out with something any minute.” He moved away, concluding,
feebly: “I guess I better crawl on home, Albert, while I'm still able
to walk some. You tell her the way it looks now I'm liable to be right
sick.”
And the next morning he woke to the chafings of remorse, picturing a
Milla somewhat restored in charm waiting hopefully at the gate, even
after half-past seven, and then, as time passed and the sound of the
distant horns came faintly through the darkness, going sadly to her
room--perhaps weeping there. It was a picture to wring him with shame
and pity, but was followed by another which electrified him, for out
of school he did not lack imagination. What if Albert had reported his
illness too vividly to Milla? Milla was so fond! What if, in her alarm,
she should come here to the house to inquire of his mother about him?
What if she told Mrs. Milholland they were “engaged”? The next moment
Ramsey was projecting a conversation between his mother and Milla in
which the latter stated that she and Ramsey were soon to be married;
that she regarded him as already virtually her husband, and demanded to
nurse him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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