Recollections of a chaperonSullivan, Arabella Jane
General
Recollections of a chaperon
Sullivan, Arabella Jane
English fiction -- 19th century
Lord Sotheron meanwhile was listless and unoccupied. He was never
unkind; but his mode of life was little suited to an animated young
man in the very flower of manhood, and he could not, indeed he did not
often attempt, to veil his ennui. She was bowed down with humiliation;
she could not exert herself. Where were all her brilliancy, her wit,
the variety, the grace of her conversation, which had so enchanted
all around? She felt she was dull, and that he on whom her every hope
depended would be driven to other society for amusement. She strove to
be entertaining; but how different was that forced pleasantry from the
gaiety of a mind at ease, inspired by the consciousness of success and
admiration. He guessed her motive, and for a moment exerted himself to
appear amused. But how different also was that forced laugh from the
admiring glance which once beamed applause at her every word, which
unconsciously followed her every movement!
In wedded life there are a thousand common subjects of interest, little
domestic concerns to be discussed; preparation for the reception of
friends to be arranged; there are a thousand pleasing recollections
of past scenes of enjoyment, and anticipations of the prospects of
their children, which prevent the _tête-à-tête_ from wearying those
whose characters and tempers are really in unison. But Walter and Lady
Ellersville had no friends to prepare for, none to talk of, in all the
unrestrained confidence of intimacy; they could not revert to past
scenes without recalling those from whom she was for ever divided; they
could not retrace the first dawnings of their mutual affection without
reviving the recollection of errors over which they would gladly draw a
veil; and then—they dared not allude to the future lot of their child,
for that was a subject of unmingled pain to both.
CHAPTER III.
And is this eye, with tears o’erfraught,
To thine no longer known?
This eye that read the tender thought
Erewhile soft trembling in thine own;
By thee, alas! to weep since taught,
And all its lustre flown?
_Unpublished Poems._
At length the divorce passed, and Maria became the wife of him whom she
loved with increasing tenderness; for all she had given up for his sake
only endeared him the more to her. Man, on the contrary, though he may
feel kindness, pity, gratitude, to woman, for the sacrifices she has
made to him, considers her as in some measure responsible for those he
has made to her.
Maria was now for the first time to see Lord Sotheron’s mother. Mrs.
Fitz-Eustace, though bowed down by this last heavy affliction, was too
gentle to be soured by it. She promised to receive her, when once she
was really her daughter-in-law. She only wished to contribute, as far
as in her lay, to the welfare or the comfort of the beloved son, who,
though no longer the pride and joy of her heart, was still to her the
most precious thing on earth.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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