Red Saunders: His Adventures West & East — John Shaqi
Red Saunders: His Adventures West & EastPhillips, Henry Wallace
General
Red Saunders: His Adventures West & East
Phillips, Henry Wallace
Fiction; Humorous stories
"So I did it, the old housekeeper following us with an armful of
things and jawing the both of us--him for a fool and me for a
villain. She was a strong-minded old lady, and I wish I could
remember some of her talk--it was great.
"We went around and got the doctor.
"'Hoo!' says he. 'Is it as bad as that?' I winked at Father Slade.
"'It's a plenty worse than that,' says I; 'you won't know the half
of it till you get down there.'
"But of course we had to tell him, and he was tickled. Funny what
an interest everybody takes in these happenings. He wanted all the
details.
"'By Jove!' says he, 'the man whose feelings ain't the least dimmed
by a broken leg--horse rolled on him, you said? Splintered it,
probably--that man is one of the right sort. He'll do to tie to.'
"When we reached the ranch the boys were lined up to meet us.
'Hurry along!' they called. 'Angey can't keep uncle amused all
day!'
"So we hustled. Kyle was for being married first, and then having
his leg set, but I put my foot down flat. It had gone long enough
now, and I wasn't going to have him cripping it all his life. But
the doctor worked like a man who gets paid by the piece, and in
less than no time we were able to call Loys in.
"Wind-River Smith spoke to get to give the bride away, and we let
him have it.
"We'd just got settled to business when in comes Angevine, puffing
like a buffalo. 'For Heaven's sakes! Ain't you finished yet?' says
he; 'well, you want to be at it, for the old man ain't over two
minutes behind me, coming fast. I took the distance in ten-foot
steps. Just my luck! Foot slipped when I was talking to him, and
I dropped a remark that made him suspicious--I wouldn't have done
it for a ton of money--but it's too late now. I'll down him and
hold him out there if you say so.'
"Well, sir, at this old Father Slade stood right up, forgetting
that foot entirely.
"'Children, be ready,' says he, and he went over the line for a
record.
"'Hurry there!' hollers old Bob from the outside, where he was on
watch; 'here comes uncle up the long coulee!'
"'What are your names?' says Father Slade. They told him, both
red'ning.
"'Do you, Kyle, take this woman, Loys, to have and keep track of,
come hell or high water, her heirs and assigns for ever?'--or such
a matter--says he, all in one breath, They both said they did.
"Things flew till we came to the ring. There was a hitch. We had
plumb forgotten that important article. For a minute I felt
stingy; then I cussed myself for a mean old long-horn, and dived
into my box.
"'Here, take this!' I says. 'It was my mother's!'
"'Oh, Red! You mustn't part with that!' cried Loys, her eyes
filling up.
"'Don't waste time talking; I put through what I tackle. Hurry,
please, Father.'
"'Has anybody any objections to these proceedings?' says he.
"'I have,' says I, 'but I won't mention 'em. Give them the
verdict.'
"'I pronounce you man and wife. Let us pray,' says he.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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