Lesbians -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Women teachers -- Fiction
She dressed abstractedly, lesson books propped against her
looking-glass, and wedged between soap-dish and pitcher. For the
hundredth time she conned the technicalities of her work, and making no
slips, grew more cheerful for it had been the letter, not the spirit,
that had troubled her--little matters of rules and exceptions, of dates
and derivations, that would surely trip her up. But she was feeling sure
of herself at last, and thrilling as she was with nervous excitement,
could yet be glad that the great day had dawned, and ready to laugh at
all her previous despondencies. Things were turning out better than she
had expected. There was bracing comfort in beginning with her own
subject--Miss Hartill's own subject. She could have no fears for herself
in the Literature examination. French in the afternoon, that was less
pleasant. But she would manage--must, literally. "Miss Hartill
expects----" She laughed. She supposed the sailors felt just the same
about Nelson as she did about Miss Hartill. She wondered if Lady
Hamilton had minded his only having one eye and one arm? Suppose Miss
Hartill had only one eye and one arm? Oh! If anything happened to Miss
Hartill...! She shivered at the idea and instantly witnessed, with all
imaginable detail, the wreck of the train as it entered Utterbridge
station, and she herself rescuing Miss Hartill, armless and blind, from
the blazing carriage. She had her on the sofa, five years later, in the
prettiest of invalid gowns, contentedly reliant on her former pupil. And
Louise, blissfully happy, was her hands and feet and eyes, her nurse,
her servant, her--(hastily Louise deprived her alike of income and
friends) her bread-winner and companion. Here her French Grammar,
slithering over the soap to the floor, woke her from that delicious
reverie.
She picked it up, and applied herself for a while to its dazing
infinitives. But teeth-brushing is a rhythmic process: her thoughts
wandered again perforce. She had got to be first.... Miss Hartill would
be so pleased.... It would be heavenly to please Miss Hartill again as
she used to do.... Nothing had been the same since Cynthia came.... She
flushed to the eyes at the recollection of her last unlucky
visit----"You needn't come again unless you can be more amusing. You
might at least be natural...." Yet Miss Hartill had been so kind at the
last ... had waved to her from the train....
The postman's knock startled her, disturbed her meditations anew.
Letters! Was it possible? Would Miss Hartill have remembered? Have sent
her, perhaps, a postcard? Stranger things had been. She had for weeks
envisaged the possibility. She finished her dressing and tore
downstairs.
The maid was hovering over the breakfast-table.
"Are there any letters, Baxter? Are there any letters?" But she had
already caught sight of a foreign postcard on her plate, a postcard with
an unfamiliar stamp. She scurried round the table, her heart thumping.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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