England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Orphans -- Fiction; Uncles -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
The best solution of the situation was to go out, and out she went,
followed by Mr. Vibart, who looked as uncomfortable as a man would look
in leaving a stall in the middle of the row during Madame Butterfly's
last song.
"I say, you know, you oughtn't to have done that," he murmured
reproachfully.
"Done what?"
"Well, talked loudly like that, and then gone out in the middle of the
service. Everybody stared at us like anything."
"Well, why did you joke with that Prayer Book?"
"I wasn't joking with the Prayer Book," Mr. Vibart affirmed in horror.
An emotion akin to dismay invaded Jasmine's soul. If she could so
completely misunderstand this not at all alarming, this freckled and
benevolent young man, how was she ever to understand her English
relatives? She had been sufficiently depressed by England throughout the
journey, but it was only now that she grasped what a profound difference
it was going to make to be herself only half English. She was evidently
going to misunderstand everything and everybody. Serious things were
going to seem jokes, and, what was worse, real jokes would seem serious.
She should offend with and in her turn be offended by trifles.
"I'm sorry," she said to Mr. Vibart. "You see, it was quite different
from everything to which I've been accustomed all my life. Oh, do let's
go and have an ice."
"Rather, if we can find a sweet-shop open."
Incomprehensible country, where ices were found in sweet-shops, and
where sweet-shops were closed on Sunday! Jasmine gave it up. However,
they did find a sweet-shop open, where she ate what tasted like a pat of
butter frozen in an old box of soap, cost fourpence, and was called a
vanilla ice-cream. She criticized it all the time she was eating it, and
then found to her mortification that Mr. Vibart supposed that he should
pay for it.
"In Sirene," Jasmine protested, "we all go and have ices when we have
money, but we always pay for ourselves. And if I'd thought that you were
going to pay, I should have pretended I thought it was very good."
The argument lasted a long time with illustrations and comparisons taken
from life at Sirene, which were so vividly related that Mr. Vibart
announced his intention of going there as soon as possible. Jasmine was
so much gratified by her conversion of an Englishman that she
surrendered about the payment for the ice, and when they got back to the
station she allowed him to manage everything. It was certainly much
easier. The surly cloak-room clerk handled the picture crates as
tenderly as a child, and even said "upsi-daisy" when he delivered them
back into their owner's possession. As for the porter with one hand he
trundled his barrow along like a jolly hoop.
"I say, let's travel First," Mr. Vibart proposed, apparently the prey to
a sudden and irresistible temptation towards extravagance.
"My ticket is third class," Jasmine objected.
"I know, so's mine," he said mysteriously. "But they know me on this
line."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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