This beautiful monition from a rigorously truthful man contains the
confession that impulsiveness was an old fault of his own. But it
includes at the same time a strong condemnation thereof, and a summons
to battle against it. The remedy which he here declared to be
efficacious he had tried on himself, and who knows with what grievous
struggles he arrived at that dominion over the impulses of a strong
nature, that restraint of external forms, and the practice of those
refined and well-bred manners, which already distinguished him when he
came to Rome, and which awakened the regard of Frau v. Bunsen (See page
98). It was certainly his honest and firm will and his manly strength,
which led him to victory, but not these alone, for through his
admonition we can hear the echo of Luther’s “Nothing is done by our own
might, ... may the Right Man aid us in the fight.” His firm trust in
God, his simple but genuine Christianity, free from every
misinterpretation, self-torment and extravagance, supported him in that
hard conflict.
In the beginning of his twentieth year he had already set before himself
his ideal of life, and this, supported by the energy of his harmoniously
constituted nature, he pursued to the end, first with struggle and
conflict, and finally without any extraordinary effort, and as if of his
own free will.
In Paris, on the occasion of the unveiling of the Vendôme column (Page
61) he wrote: “What can make a deeper impression than the strength of
mind which shows itself in a composed bearing and an expression of
control, in contrast with the unbridled passions of similar human
minds.” To win this “composed bearing,” to acquire perfect command over
unbridled impulses, was the aim of all his labor with himself. No, the
character of a Lepsius did not come into the world as a thing completed,
did not spring like Pallas Athene from the head of Zeus: it was won by
hard, prolonged and repeated struggles.
In this campaign against an adversary who, however often he may be
slain, continually wakens to new life, he accustomed himself to consider
impulsiveness as an enemy, as a peace-breaker, as a disease of sound
human nature. This latter, to his eyes, could only be truly great when
ruled by calm self-control. Here we find an explanation of the words
which he wrote to Bunsen when twenty-nine years old, and which must
appear paradoxical and startling to the uninitiated. During his sojourn
in England in 1839 his heart had been won by a lovely maiden, but his
material circumstances would not permit him to woo her. All this he
confessed to his sympathetic patron in reply to his enquiries, and
added, “I hold every passion to be a defect in love, and why shall I, at
the very outset, declare myself too weak to preserve the purity of true
love, and keep it from cooling into passion?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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