Football -- Juvenile fiction; Schools -- Juvenile fiction
“Not a bit. Johnny knows me, and he knows that what I say is for
the good of his soul. We aristocrats, General, have got to make the
hoi polloi understand that they can’t shove into our sacred circle
off-hand. They’ve got to train for it, old man; work up; go through an
initiation.”
Leonard observed Slim in puzzlement and doubt.
“Why,” Slim went on soberly, “what do you suppose old Jeremy Staples
would say if he could see me now hob-nobbing with the son of a plumber?
The poor old rascal would turn over in his grave, General. Bet you he’d
turn over twice!”
“Oh,” said Leonard, “I thought you meant it!”
“Who says I don’t? Ah, that sounds mighty cheerful, Johnny! Sure you
didn’t put any arsenic in it? My folks are English on my uncle’s side!”
“I’d not waste good arsenic on the likes of you,” answered Johnny,
pouring from a frosted glass pitcher. Followed several moments of
deeply appreciative silence during which visitors and host applied
themselves to the straws that emerged from the glasses. Then Slim
sighed rapturously and held his glass out for more.
“It may be poisoned, Johnny,” he said, “but I’ll take a chance.”
“Are you at Alton?” Leonard asked presently of his host.
“Didn’t I tell you he was?” asked Slim in mild surprise. “He certainly
is. Johnny’s the one bright spot on the basket ball team. You’ll never
know the poetry of motion, General, until you’ve seen him toss a
back-hander into the hoop. The only trouble with him is that, true to
his race, he always mistakes a basket ball game for the Battle of the
Boyne. At least, I think I mean the Boyne. Do I, Johnny?”
“Maybe. I wasn’t there. Anyhow, you’re giving Grant here a wrong idea
of me entirely. I’m the most peaceable lad on the team, Slim Staples,
and you know it.”
“I know nothing of the sort,” protested Slim stoutly. “All I do know is
that whenever you’re playing the casualties are twice as heavy as when
you’re not. Oh, I know you have a foxy way of handing out the wallops,
and that the referee seldom catches you at it, but facts are facts,
Johnny, and I’m nothing if not factotum.”
“You’re nothing if not insulting,” corrected Johnny. “Why does he call
you ‘General?’” he continued of Leonard.
“Why, he hit on that--” Leonard began.
“Is it possible you never heard of General Grant?” demanded Slim
incredulously.
“Oh, that’s it? Well,” as Slim stood up to go and Leonard followed his
example, “I’m pleased to have met you. Come again, won’t you? I’ll not
be asking Slim, for he’s too insulting.”
“Oh, now that I know where you live and what good lemonade you keep
on draught, I’ll come frequently,” said Slim kindly. “Maybe we might
drop around next Sunday afternoon about this time, or a little before.
You’d better make it a point to have plenty of lemons on hand.”
“Why, if you come we’ll not be without them,” Johnny assured him
sweetly.
“Fine! And now, before we go, may we see the pig, Johnny?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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